Friday, December 18, 2009

What Christmas Means to Me - The Birth of a Savior

What Christmas means to me: The Birth of the Savior of the World
Part V of V
***
In my recent writings I talked about what Christmas means to me. To me Christmas is about:
The magic of childhood, Christmas traditions, Family and Giving

Today, I end with part V of V in the series of What Christmas Mean to Me. The most important, and the real reason for Christmas celebrations is the birth of the Savior of the world. Christmas is about good news! Christmas is about hope and salvation.

What Christmas Means to Me: The Birth of a Savior

It’s about the birth of a child; a child who was born to bring salvation to the world. Christmas is about a child born in a stable because there was no room for them in the inn. It is about a child wrapped in swaddling clothes and laid in a manger. It is about shepherds tending their sheep when angel of the Lord appeared to them. The angel of the Lord best describes what Christmas is really about: "Fear not for, behold, I bring you good tidings of great joy, which shall be to all people. For unto you is born this day in the city of David a Savior, which is Christ the Lord." And with the angel their was a multitude of heavenly host praising God and saying "Glory to God in the highest, and on earth peace, good will toward men."

Need I say more!
And, that's what Christmas means to me!

***

It's your life: live it, love it, & celebrate it!

Thursday, December 17, 2009

What Christmas Means to Me - Giving

That’s What Christmas Means to Me: Giving
Part IV of V
***
Christmas is a time of giving. It’s also a time for gift giving. The giving of Christmas gifts is deeply rooted in our culture. At one time, the early Christian Church attempted to ban the custom. The movement met with so much resistance, that the Church relented. Instead, the Church looked for ways to integrate the practice of giving gifts into the Christian Faith. So, early Christian leaders justified the practice by noting the presentation of gifts from the Magi to the baby Jesus.

The best gifts this Christmas will not come in a nicely wrapped box, with a ribbons and a shiny bow. No, the best presents this Christmas will come from the heart. There are two types of presents that come from the heart. The first is material. They are presents that we make for others with the talents that God has bestowed upon. These presents have emotional value, which far outweigh the value of a store bought present. The second is spiritual. They are the presents that come in the form of action; the giving of yourself.

This Christmas you can give of yourself by visiting the elderly, feeding the poor, praying for the sick, volunteering your time, donating to a charity, spending time with someone hurting, or assisting those in need; just to name a few. In the words of Kahlil Gibran, "You give but little when you give of your possessions. It is when you give of yourself that you truly give."

When you give of yourself, you’re giving from the heart. When giving is truly from the heart, and with no expectation of something in return, a paradoxical relationship develops. You see, the more you give, the more you get. Now, I don’t mean getting material possessions, I mean receiving a spiritual gift. Hence, it really is true that it’s in giving that you receive. When you give of yourself, you receive personal satisfaction, peace of mind and more importantly, the grace of God.

Winston Churchill once said, "We make a living by what we get, but we make a life by what we give."
This Christmas, the best present you can give to someone else is the gift of yourself; no fancy paper, curly ribbons or shiny bows, just you!

Christmas is about giving! And, that’s what Christmas means to me!
***
It's Your Life: Live it, Love it, Celebrate it!

Wednesday, December 16, 2009

What Christmas Means to Me - Family

That’s What Christmas Means to Me: Family Part III of V
***

Christmas is a time for the gathering of family. It’s a special time of year. It’s a time to worship together, visit relatives, play family games, and revisit the past through the telling of stories of old. It’s a time to remember our loved ones who have gone before us. It’s a time to feast on fine food and festive treats, sing carols, exchange gifts, watch homemade videos, read Christmas stories and take family pictures. It’s a time to honor our family traditions.

Christmas really isn’t about anything material, it’s about everything that is spiritual; spiritual in the sense that it is about the heart, the mind and the soul. Nothing has a greater impact on one’s spirit than one’s family. Christmas is about family.

Charles Dickens, in his 1843 novel, A Christmas Carol, brilliantly contrasts Ebenezer Scrooge, a cold-hearted, greedy, loner of a man with Bob Cratchit, a poor, hard working, family man. Scrooge is consumed with wealth. He is a miserable, lonely old man. On one of the most joyous days of the year, Scrooge has nothing but disdain for Christmas and its traditions. Bob Cratchit, on the other hand, embraces the joys of Christmas. He desperately wants to be with his family and provide for them a Christmas dinner. Bob Cratchit is a family man. Although he lives an impoverished lifestyle, Bob Cratchit has everything he needs; he has his family. Scrooge’s main focus in life is money and power; money and power that leads to his misery. Cratchit’s focus is on his family. Cratchit has love and family; love and family that sustains him and leads to peace of mind.

The more you appreciate your family, the more you’ll cherish this Christmas. Your character is largely shaped by the family values you’ve shared and practiced while growing up. It’s through our family that we receive the greatest amount of love and support. Outside of God’s love for us, there is no substitute for the love of a parent, the love of a spouse, the love of a sibling, or the love of a child. There should be no greater connection than our connection to our family. The family is a unit. A unit united by shared experiences, both good and bad, and the emotions tied to those experiences.

This Christmas I ask that you embrace this special time of year and cherish the time you spend with your family. If there is conflict with a family member, put it aside; put it aside for the greater good, the good of your family. Ask God to give you the courage and strength to forgive a family member, who may have done you wrong. Or, ask God to give you the courage and the strength, to apologize and ask for forgiveness from a family member if you may be in the wrong.

Christmas is a about family. It’s a time when a smile can easily be invoked by the sharing of family memories; it’s a time to savor the present moment with family, while sharing God's greatest gift to us, Love; and, it's a time to commit to a future where the values of family love and self-sacrifice will endure.

And that's what Christmas means to me!


***
It's your life: live it, love it & celebrate it!

Tuesday, December 15, 2009

What Christmas Means to Me - Traditions

What Christmas Means to Me: Holiday Traditions part II of V

***
Christmas is rich with traditions. Christmas is sending Christmas cards, baking Christmas cookies, singing Rudolph the Red Nose Reindeer and kissing under the mistletoe, just to name a few. When it comes to holiday traditions, there is none other than Christmas. According to Webster’s Dictionary, tradition is "an inherited, established, or customary pattern of thought, action, or behavior." Because traditions are inherited they form a strong familial and cultural bond. Because of the significance of our Christmas traditions, we eagerly await the arrival of Christmas, so we may carry on with our traditions.

You’ve heard of traditional holiday favorites. Like Bing Crosby’s White Christmas or the movie, It’s a Wonderful Life. Traditional favorites are those traditions that have not only endured the test of time, but are considered the very best of among all the traditions. I never tire of hearing Bing Crosby sing, "I’m dreaming of a white Christmas," or hear Clarence say, "Every time a bell rings, an angel gets its wings," However; there are some traditions that must come to end. They’ve outlived their usefulness or value. They’ve drawn down on our resources, with little, if any, payoff. Bear in mind that some of our traditions may actually produce negative outcomes; excessive stress, emotional discomfort and family discord. Traditions that promote negative outcomes must go.

This Christmas, I ask you to take a good look at your what behaviors your routinely engage in. Christmas is a time of reflection; as well as a time of hope. So as you reflect upon your life, ask yourself what traditional behaviors (habits) have you practiced that are leading to peace of mind, good health, and achievement? What traditional behaviors (habits) are holding you back? Are you continuing with traditional behaviors (habits) that are bad for you, only because it’s more comforting to continue with them than to cope with changing them? If you’ve tried to break traditional behaviors that you know are bad for you and you’ve been unsuccessful, remember the words of Mary Pickford, "This thing that we call failure is not the falling down, but the staying down."

Christmas is a time of hope. Winning the battle over a habit is not easy, but the rewards are well worth the price. Don't wait until it’s too late. Often times, we wait until there is trauma or desperation in order to act. This Christmas it’s time to break tradition. Choose a habit that you're willing to break; start with something small. Make a commitment to change and begin creating a new behavior that will produce positive results.

Christmas is a time for traditions. It’s a time enjoy those things that our families have passed down to us, and a time for us to enjoy the traditions of our nation. Christmas is a time for us to decide which traditions are to be honored and which traditions must come to end. The lifespan of a tradition is determined by the value it brings. Every Christmas, I look forward to traditions that bring me closer to God, my family and friends! To me, these are the traditions that will endure a lifetime.

And that’s what Christmas means to me!

***

Its your life: live it, love it, & celebrate it!

Monday, December 14, 2009

What Christmas Means to Me - The Magic of Childhood

Candles burnin' low,
Lot's of mistle toe.
Lot's of snow and ice,
Everywhere we go.
Choirs singin' carols,
Right outside my door.
That's what Christmas Means to me my love.

In 1967 Stevie Wonder released That's What Christmas Means to Me. The song is a love song that describes a romantic relationship and the pleasures of a material world at Christmas.

***
This week I'll be writing about what Christmas means to me. This is the first of a five part series.

What Christmas Means to Me Part I of V: The Magic of Childhood

Who is not amazed at the magic of childhood? It is especially evident at Christmas time; the look in a child's eyes, the anticipation on a child's face, the excitement in child's body, and the whirlwind of thoughts racing through a child's mind. Children live in a world where their dreams really do come true. At Christmas, they dream of Santa Claus who magically travels the world to give gifts to good little boys and girls. On Christmas morning, their dreams come true!

We all know the why and the how of a child's dream coming true on Christmas morning. But, in order for their dream to come true. They must first start with a dream. That's the magic of childhood. Children are creative by nature. They allow their minds to take them places where they've never been, to do things that they never done, and to become any person that they choose to be. In addition to their creativity, they believe that their dreams really will come true. Their belief allows them to live their dreams. The formula for the magic of childhood is creativity coupled with an unfailing belief.

Sadly, the magic seems to wane as a child grows older. For most adults, the magic disappears completely. It disappears because our creativity gives way to conformity and belief gives way to doubt. We no longer can see things, or be things that don't exist. The magic disappears because we allowed the opinions of others to poison the creative thinking process and destroy our belief systems. We worry about what other people might think or say about us. The poison of others slowly works to become a self-induced poisoning, where we tell ourselves that dreams are for dreamers, and if we did dare to dream, it would never come true for us.

This Christmas I ask that you search for the lost magic of childhood. Since we were all a child at one time, we possess the magic. You never lost it, you simply allowed others to convince you not to use it. When you begin to dream like a child and believe that dreams really do come true - watch out! Who knows where your dreams will take you and what your dreams will allow you to do.

Don't believe me, ask a child!

Christmas is about the Magic of Childhood ... and that's what Christmas means to me!

***
It's your life: live it, love it & celebrate it!

Friday, December 11, 2009

The Right Questions

The most serious mistakes are not being made as a result of wrong answers. The truly dangerous thing is asking the wrong question.
-- Peter Drucker

***


Asking the wrong questions, can demonstrate one of two things: a lack of understanding or a lack of focus. One can overcome a lack of understanding by searching for knowledge related to the issue. Generally, when one possesses a degree of knowledge about an issue, one begins to ask the right questions. Asking the right questions, should inevitable lead to the right answers.

It is more difficult to overcome a lack of focus. A loss of focus can result from several things. In order to develop and maintain your focus, focus on those things that are truly important to you. First, make a list of your values. Second, make a list of everything that you do that is important to you. Next, rank order the items by importance. If your values are not in line with your list of important things, you basically have two forces pulling in the opposite direction. The end result is a lack of focus, resulting in anxiety. Make sure that your values and behaviors are consistent. If you truly value something and your behavior is consistent with those values, its difficult to lose focus. By having the right focus, you'll ask the right questions.

Asking the right questions requires knowledge and focus. The work is done on the front end; acquire the knowledge, and develop and maintain the focus. If you're willing to do the work on the front end, you'll find you're asking the right questions and getting the right answers!

Gotta Go! Gotta few questions I need to ask and answer!

It's your life: Live it, Love it & Celebrate it!

MJD

Wednesday, December 9, 2009

The Heart of the Matter

"The more anger towards the past you carry in your heart, the less capable you are of loving in the present."
- Barbara De Angelis

 ***

Anger breeds Anger.  Love breeds love.  Whatever your heart feels it will seek to satisfy.  When your heart if full of anger, jealousy and vengefulness, unfortunately, you'll engage in behaviors that satisfy the heart.  An angry heart consumes energy: physical, emotional, mental and spiritual.  Whereas an angry heart consumes energy, a loving heart amasses energy. 

The emotion of anger has a purpose in our lives.  It should serve us to work harder, to alert us that something is wrong, and/or to spur us into action to defend ourselves, another person, or a social injustice.  However, carrying anger in our hearts serves no worthwhile purpose and is damaging to the soul.  An angry heart is fostered from not letting go; an unwillingness to forgive.  

If you possess an angry heart you may feel justified.  It’s likely someone did you wrong.  You need to understand that an angry heart does absolutely nothing to the person that you are angry with.  The person you are angry with will go about doing his/her business irrespective of the anger carried in your heart.  For you, possessing an angry heart robs you of the joy that a loving heart brings.   Since it is impossible to experience anger and love at the exact same moment, an angry heart will dominate your thoughts and your thoughts will become actions.  Being angry, jealous, and vengeful is no way to go through life.  The anger you harbor in your heart is negative energy and it will eventually take its toll on you.

For those with an angry heart, take heed of Jesus' words to Peter concerning forgiveness.  Jesus told Peter we must forgive our brother "seventy times seven."   Why, “seventy time seven?”  Seems to me, the Great Teacher is providing us some insight into the immense value in forgiveness.  Today, look to forgive one with whom you have an angry heart.    For when you do, you'll understand that it is forgiveness that truly sets you free.

Angry heart or loving heart – the choice yours!

It’s your life: live it, love it & celebrate it!
MJD

Monday, December 7, 2009

The Experience

Experience is not what happens to you. Experience is what you DO with what happens to you.
--Aldous Huxley

***
The most profound teacher you will ever have is your own life experiences. Pay close attention to the lessons that your experiences have to offer. An experience has two basic components: an event and a feeling associated with an event. An event is neither good, nor bad; It's simply an event - a series of things occurring. It is the feeling associated with the event and the value you place on the event that counts. Allow your experiences to serve you, not hold you back. Remember, every experience has a lesson to offer. It is what you do with your experience that counts!

Gotta Go - Got some lessons to study!

***
It's Your Life: Live it, Love it, Celebrate it!
MJD

Thursday, December 3, 2009

Stealing a Base

"You cannot steal a base without a risk of getting thrown out."
- Michael J. Dillon

***

Life is full of risks. It's only when we take a risk that we can advance in the direction of our hopes and dreams, and reach our full potential . When you decide to take one of life's risks, remember these two simple rules of base running: don't hesitate and stay focused. One of the biggest mistakes a baserunner can make is to allow doubt to momentarily paralyze them. And so it is with life; don't let doubt paralyze you. For if you do, you'll likely remain at the same base or get thrown out trying to advanced. If we wait for the perfect time, the perfect time may never come. Often times, we may have our sights set on something, but we do not know how to achieve it. If our passion and believe are strong enough and we begin moving in the right direction, the "how to" will often find us.

The other crucial mistake that is made when stealing a base is to take your eyes off the base. A base runner must stay focused and listen to the base coach. When a base runner turns to look at the catcher, the baserunner loses speed. Although it may be a fraction of a second, a fraction of a second may make the difference. When stealing a base, a baserunner must listen to instructions from the base coach. And so it is with life; don't look back, stay focused. Don't let your past or fear slow you down. Don't lose sight of your goal. And, just as a base coach is there to assist a baserunner, listen to the coaches in your life. Listen to those people that support your efforts and want to see you achieve. Stay away from those people who do not believe in you, and are the first to offer a reason why you can't do something. Those people have never stolen a base in their life.

You've got the steal sign now - go ahead and put yourself in scoring position!

***

It's your life: Live it, Love it & Celebrate it!
MJD

Wednesday, December 2, 2009

Debt Free, Really?

"A man's indebtedness is not virtue; his repayment is. Virtue begins when he dedicates himself actively to the job of gratitude."
- Ruth Benedict

***

People will often set a goal to be debt free.  While that is an admirable goal, no one can ever be totally debt free.  It is true that one can be fiscally debt free; owe nobody nothing for financial consideration.  But, nobody can ever be without debt!  Why?  You are indebted to far too many people to be debt free.

To whom you might ask?  You are indebted to the following:  To your parents who gave you life, love and all kinds of support: physical, financial and emotional.  To your teachers who taught you way more than just reading, writing and arithmetic .  To doctors, nurses and medical professionals who have played a vital role in helping you maintain a healthy life.  To police officers and firefighters who work tirelessly to help keep us safe.  To the service men and women; those who have lost their lives, those who once served and those currently serving our country so we may enjoy the fruits of freedom.   To all those people who said the right thing, held our hand or simply smiled at us when we were feeling down.  The list goes on and on and on...! 

So you see you can never really be debt free.  While it may never be possible to repay all of your debt, it is possible to be truly grateful for what you have, what has been given to you, and what has been done for you.

Try practicing an attitude of gratitude it goes a long way repaying your indebtedness.

Gotta go!  Got a whole lot of debt to repay!

It’s your life:  live it, love it & celebrate it!

MJD

Tuesday, December 1, 2009

True Success

"To laugh often and much; to win the respect of intelligent people and the affection of children; to earn the appreciation of honest critics and endure the betrayal of false friends, to appreciate beauty, to find the best in others; whether by a healthy child, a garden patch or a redeemed social condition; to know even one life has breathed easier because you have lived. This is to have succeeded."
- Ralph Waldo Emerson

***
True success cannot be measured by the size of your home, the size of your car, the size of your wallet or the size of your portfolio. True success can only be measured by the size of your heart!

***

It's your life: Live it; Love it, & Celebrate it!
- MJD

The Measure of Success

To laugh often and much; to win the respect of intelligent people and the affection of children; to earn the appreciation of honest critics and endure the betrayal of false friends, to appreciate beauty, to find the best in others; whether by a healthy child, a garden patch or a redeemed social condition; to know even one life has breathed easier because you have lived. This is to have succeeded."
- Ralph Waldo Emerson

***

True success cannot be measured by the size of your home, the size of your car, the size of your wallet or the size of your portfolio. True success can only be measured by the size of your heart!


***
It's your life: Live it, Love it, & Celebrate it!
MJD


Monday, November 30, 2009

The Zone

If there is no struggle, there is no progress. 
- Frederick Douglass, 1817-1895, American Abolitionist

POINT TO PONDER:

If you always do what you've always done, you always get what you've always got – Ah, the comfort zone.  The comfort zone is known for being safe, consistent, and predictable.  The problem, however, is not much learning takes place inside the zone.  It's only when you step outside the comfort zone that learning and growth take place.  When you step outside the comfort zone, you're likely to be greeted with fear, anxiety, and adversity.  It's only by facing fear, channeling anxiety, and overcome adversity that progress can take place.  There is nothing wrong with status quo, but if you want to grow, you've got to go (outside the zone).  Today, I'm encouraging to take a trip outside the comfort zone.  When you do, you'll be absolutely amazed at the potential within.

It's your life: live it, love it, & celebrate it
MJD

Tuesday, November 24, 2009

Enough

"He is a wise man who does not grieve for the things which he has not, but rejoices for those which he has."
-- Epictetus

***
Those that always want will never have enough. Those that have enough will never want. There can be no satisfaction when you feel you don't have enough. Why? Because the search for what you don't have never ends. If you truly count your blessing you will find you really do have enough. When we are thankful for what we have, we begin to treasure what we have far more than what we don't have.

***
I Wish You Enough
-- Bob Perks

I wish you enough sun to keep your attitude bright.

I wish you enough rain to appreciate the sun more.

I wish you enough happiness to keep your spirit alive.

I wish you enough pain so that the smallest joys in life appear much bigger.

I wish you enough gain to satisfy your wanting.

I wish you enough loss to appreciate all that you possess.

I wish enough "Hello's" to get you through the final "Goodbye.

***
It's your life: Live it, Love it & Celebrate it!

MJD

Thanksgiving Thought

Gratitude is not only the greatest of virtues, but the parent of all the others.
-- Cicero

***
Gratitude fosters compassion. One cannot possess an attitude of gratitude and be indifferent at the same time.

Gratitude fosters benevolence. One cannot possess an attitude of gratitude and be selfish at the same time.

Gratitude fosters respect. One cannot possess an attitude of gratitude and be contemptuous at the same time.

Gratitude fosters generosity. One cannot possess an attitude of gratitude and be stingy at the same time.

Gratitude fosters kindness. One cannot possess an attitude of gratitude and be cruel at the same time.

Gratitude fosters contentment. One cannot possess an attitude of gratitude and be covetous at the same time.

Gratitude fosters resourcefulness. One cannot possess an attitude of gratitude and be wasteful at the same time.

This Thanksgiving think of all the gifts that you have in your life. Give thanks for all that you have been blessed with, and more importantly, tell those who have made a difference in your life how special they are to you. For if you do, you'll discover what Cicero preached over 2000 years ago. Amazing, some things never change!

Thanks to all of you who have influenced my life in one way or another. I've been extremely fortunate to have such a wonderful family, great friends and exceptional colleagues.
Thanks to all of you who so generously accept these e-mails, and for forwarding some on to your friends and family.

***
It's Your Life: Live it, Love it, Celebrate it!
MJD

Thursday, November 19, 2009

I Can See Clearly Now

"The best vision is insight."
-- Malcolm S. Forbes

***
There are two types of vision: sight and insight. Sight is physical. Insight is mental. Sight is the ability to see. Insight is the ability to know. Because insight is on a mental plane, one can always gain insight from sight. However, because sight is on the physical plane, one can never gain sight from insight.

Sight is limited to your field of vision and can only be enhanced by medical procedures and devices. Insight is limitless and is enhanced by knowledge. The more you learn, the more you know. The more you know, the better your insight. With insight comes the ability to discern thing in an intuitive manner. That which we see may not always be true. But, with insight, we are often able to come to know things that the naked eye is not able to reveal.

How do we acquire insight? Become a student; live to learn. You may ask yourself, "how much do I need to learn." The answer is, "as much as possible."

Remember there are a great number of people who can see, but do not know!
Study time anyone?

***
It's Your Life: Live it, Love it, Celebrate it!
MJD

Monday, November 16, 2009

The Power in Believing

To be a champ, you have to believe in yourself when nobody else will."
-- Sugar Ray Robinson

***
When a boxer "throws in the towel," the match is over. The tossing of the towel signifies that boxer is accepting defeat. How many times have you accepted defeat when victory was right around the corner. You accepted defeat because you no longer believed you were capable of winning. You let the cynics, critics, and naysayers influence your thinking. You bought into their negative agenda and let them rob you of maximizing your potential. What would happen if you disassociated yourself from the cynics, critics and naysayers in your life and surrounded yourself with people who support you and want you to succeed? It's my guess that if you do, you won't be throwing in the towel anytime soon!

***
It's Your Life: Live it, Love it, Celebrate it!
MJD

Friday, November 13, 2009

The Fortune in Misfortunate

“The longer we dwell on our misfortunes, the greater is their power to harm us.”-Voltaire

***
POINT TO PONDER: It’s our own thinking that creates harm; not the enemy, not the event, not the circumstance.  When we allow an enemy, an event, or a circumstance to have power over us, we become a victim.  Hence, we create our own victimization. Instead of allowing misfortunes to take advantage of you, why not take advantage of your misfortunes.  Look for the lesson in misfortune and learn from it. Misfortunes should serve you, not harm you.  The root word in misfortunate is fortunate.  How fortunate you’ll be is totally up to you.  If you remind yourself that a misfortunate event is only temporary and carries with it the potential for development and growth, you’ll find that no time, you’ll be taking advantage of misfortune and not misfortune taking advantage of you.

Today, start dwelling on the fortunate from misfortune, you just might be amazed at how fortunate you really are!

***It’s your life; live it, love it, & celebrate it!

MJD

Thursday, November 12, 2009

Did I

Did I make someone giggle, smile or laugh today?

Did I take the time to really listen to someone today?

Did I allow myself to focus on all the blessings in my life today instead of contemplating the things I don't have?

Did I let go today, let go of resentments and prejudices that I have been holding onto?

Did I keep my word today?

Did I make a conscious choice just to be happy today?

Did I stop caring about what other people think of me, and give myself permission to be who I am regardless of their opinion of me?

Did I contribute something beautiful to the world today? A new creation of some kind, a poem, a dinner, a dance?

Did I make it a point to be kind to everyone I came in contact with today?

Did I enrich someone else's life today?

Did I learn something new today, something about life, something about another, or something about myself?

Did I let go of my attachment to being right today, and open my mind to the possibility of another way, without judgement?

Did I help to answer someone's prayers today?

-- Adapted from In a Dream, You Can Do Anything by Veronica Hay
***
How dramatically would your life change or how much happier would you be if "Did I" became your mantra? What would happen if you were constantly reminded of "Did I?" How about making little card/notes with "Did I" inscribed upon them. Put one in your wallet/purse, put one on your desk/workstation at school/work, put one on your bathroom mirror, put one on your dash/visor of your car, put one anywhere were you'll be reminded of "Did I." After a period of time, the visual reminders will give way to permanent thought and permanent thought produces likewise behavior. Once "Did I" I becomes a focal point in your life, you'll be able to answer the 'Did I" questions with "Yes I Did." Not only will you be happier but those around you will be happier too!

***
It's Your Life: Live it, Love it, Celebrate it!
MJD

Monday, November 2, 2009

Throwing Stones

We can throw stones, complain about them, stumble on them, climb over them, or build with them.
-- William Arthur Ward

***
Throwing stones causes damage and heartbreak,
Complaining about stones causes anxiety and negativity.
Stumbling on stones causes disruption and pain
Climbing over stones causes avoidance and diversion,
So, why not use stones to your advantage and begin building with them!

***

It's your life: Live it, Love it & Celebrate it!
MJD

Friday, June 19, 2009

The Gift of Lessons

"One father is more than a hundred schoolmasters."
~ 17th Century English Proverb

***

Father’s day is soon to be here and this composition is a tribute to my father.

The English Proverb, “One father is more than a hundred schoolmasters” speaks volumes. The lessons that a father teaches his children become lifelong lessons; some good, some bad; some intentional, some unintentional; some by discourse, some by observation. It’s these lessons that his children will use in formulating their paradigm of values. Unlike a schoolmaster, children have an strong emotional connection with their father. Hence, the lessons learned from a father through what he says, does, and feels, have far more of an impact on a child than the wisest of all schoolmasters.

To my dad, I say a heartfelt thank you for the following lessons:

Thanks for teaching me how to be a Christian.
Thanks for teaching me how to be a father.
Thanks for teaching me how to be husband.
Thanks for teaching me how to be a sibling.
Thanks for teaching me how to be a friend.

Thanks for teaching me how to be an employee.
Thanks for teaching me how to be an athlete.
Thanks for teaching me how to be a coach.

Thanks for teaching me the value in honesty.
Thanks for teaching me the benefits of humility.
Thanks for teaching me the significance of a strong worth ethic.
Thanks for teaching me the value in giving.
Thanks for teaching me the worth in kindness.

Thanks for teaching me about honor and loyalty.
Thanks for teaching me about confidence and self-respect.
Thanks for teaching me about determination and discipline.
Thanks for teaching me about sacrifice and perseverance.

Most of all, thank you for always being there for me!

A lesson is a gift! And so, I’ve been blessed abundantly. The lessons from my father are gifts of character. Unlike material gifts, which I've received far more from my father than I've deserved, the lessons my father have taught me can never be broken, destroyed or taken away from me. The lessons are mine for good. It’s now up to me to make the best use of the lessons my father has given to me.

Perhaps the greatest tribute I can give to my dad is a quote from an unknown author. The quote says, “The greatest gift I ever had came from God; I call him Dad!

Happy Father’s Day Dad!


To all you father’s, enjoy your special day!

***
It’s your life; Live it, Love it & Celebrate it!
MJD

Friday, May 29, 2009

Give Me Liberty...














"Give me liberty, or give me death!"
~Patrick Henry

***

Patrick Henry will forever be remembered for his speech before fellow colonists that ended with the passionate proclamation, “Give me liberty or give me death.” Patrick Henry was steadfastly opposed to Britain’s governance over the colonies. Considered one of the most influential leaders of the American Revolution, Patrick Henry had a vision of a better America. He believed that America would become a great nation, but not until the colonies were free from British Rule. British rule was too oppressive. America could never reach its full potential until the colonies were free from British governance. For Patrick Henry it was far better to die fighting for freedom than to submit to a life of oppression.

Patrick Henry’s made his famous speech in 1775 before the Virginia House of Burgesses. Although he was specifically addressing the colonies revolt against British rule, he was speaking to heart of what it means to be liberated. Liberty is freedom; freedom from control. It’s the ability to make choices; choices free from influence.

The opposite of liberty is constraint. Are you experiencing liberty or constraint? If you're experiencing constraint, what oppressive influences are in your life: negative friends, family members, coworkers and/or neighbors? What about self-imposed contraints: negative thinking, negative habits and self-destructive behaviors. Are you allowing these oppressive influences to control your life?

You’ll never be all that you’re capable of becoming if you allow yourself to be controlled by others. Controlling people will rob you of your uniqueness and will shape you into something they desire you to be. If you have controlling people in your life, now is the time to disassociate yourself from these people. If disassociation is not possible, limit your association with these people. If limitation is not possible, stand up to the person and let them know that you want to be loved for who you are and not what they are trying to make you to be. You see, if you try to be something you're not, you'll make two people unhappy in the process: yourself and the controller. Best to make only one person unhappy instead of two. Make it a point to associate with people who accept you for who you are and will support your hopes, dreams and goals.

You’ll never be all that you’re capable of becoming living with self-imposed constraints. Negative thinking produces negative behaviors; behaviors which lead to negative habits. Habits are often unconscious behavioral patterns. A habit once formed is difficult to break. The good news is however, you can break any habit. Because habits are learned through repetition, they can be unlearned through the same process. Don’t allow negative habits to control your life any longer. Since you’re the one that created them, you’re the one who can break them. Don't allow these negative habits to control you any longer. Rather, develop good habits that will assist you in living a happy, healthy and productive life.

Just as Patrick Henry longed for the colonies to be free of British influence, you too, should long to be free of all the negative influences in your life. To Patrick Henry, a life without liberty was a fate worth than death. Patrick Henry recognized the fruits of liberty would be worth the toil. Henry, the revoltionist, fought fiercely for colonial independence. Now is the time for you to put up a fierce fight for yourself. Fight for a life free of controlling influences and start enjoying life for all that it has to offer and enjoying yourself for all you have to offer life.

Its your life: LIVE IT, LOVE IT, CELEBRATE IT!
MJD
***

Friday, May 8, 2009

Faith, Family, Friends and Food

"God could not be everywhere, so he created mothers."
~Jewish Proverb

***
A mother’s life is characterized by giving.  It’s a giving that is truly endless.   It’s a giving that takes many, many forms.  From the very moment of conception, a mother gives of herself.   The embryo is physiologically dependent upon the mother.   It’s the mother who sustains the life of her child.  At birth, the dependency changes from a physiological dependency to an emotional, social, and physical dependency.  Webster’s Dictionary defines dependent as,” Relying on another for support.”  In order to satisfy the definition, it requires that someone receive support and someone give support.  The unbridled support that a mother gives to her child is called “Motherly Love.”  It’s the unselfish giving by a mother that reflects the essence of motherly love. "Motherly love" demands time, attention, and sacrifice.


My mother could easily be the “poster mom” for “Motherly Love.”  Her whole life has been characterized by the giving of herself.  She has put the needs of her children, husband and family well above her own needs.  The love and support that she has provided to us is immeasurable.  She’s always there when you need her and she always seems to say the just the right things at just the right time.  My mother’s presence in a room brings about a peaceful and warm feeling.  It's a feeling that everything is the way it supposed to be.  When I think about it, it shouldn’t be that surprising; being that she’s the one that gave me my life, sustained my life, and has always done her best meet all of my needs, whatever they may be.  No wonder things just seem to be right when she’s around.

My mother has demonstrated time after time that her family always comes first.  Perhaps, the most poignant example is my mother’s support of my father.  My father has achieved great success and accolades as a coach.  If it wasn’t for my mother’s support, this never would have been possible.  My mother has always encouraged and supported my father to pursue has passion.  Perhaps one of the most difficult roles to accept in life is that of a coach’s wife.  Often times, a wife can take the proverbial, “backseat” to the sport or the program.  My mother has never made it about her.  Rather, her life is about her children, husband and family.

My mother has given me so many things, both tangible and intangible, that I couldn’t begin to comprehend the extent of them.  Perhaps one of the best gifts my mother has given me is her value system.  The gift of her values has taught me what is really important in life.  The gift of a value cannot break, nor be replaced with a shiny, newer model.  Mom's gift of values will remain with me and be the focal point of my life for the rest of my life.  Her values, simple: Faith, Family, Friends and Food.

To Mom, the most important thing in life is your relationship with God.  My mother raised us in a home where faith has been the center of our lives.  Mom knew the importance of passing the gift of faith onto her children.

To Mom, your commitment to your family is second only to your relationship to God.  My mother has given to our family unselfishly and tirelessly. Mom has taught us that your family is your “rock.” Mom knew the importance of passing family values on to her children.

Of lesser importance, but still important nonetheless to Mom, is friends and food.  My mother knows the value that friends can add to you life. She loves spending time with her friends.  In most instances, mom is usually the life of a party.  In her mid-seventies, she still has swing in her step and has not lost her passion for life.  It always brings a smile to my face to see a woman who has given so much of herself to make the best of everything and enjoying what life has to offer.

Plainly put, my Mother is one heck of a cook.  She puts the meaning in “Mom’s home cooking.”  To Mom, good food represents the fruits of our labors.  The food serves as a reminder to us to be thankful for our bounty.  Mom has passed on to us the importance of friendship and the breaking of bread with family and friends.

Mom, I will never be able to repay you for all that you have done for me, all the lessons that you’ve taught me, and the love and support you have given to me. Mother, please understand that the very best way for me to describe my love for you is as follows: For as much as you love me, I in return love you same, and maybe just a little bit more!

HAPPY MOTHER"S DAY MOM!

To all you mothers, have a wonderful Mother’s Day.
A mother’s love truly does make the world go round.

It's Your Life: Live it, Love it, Celebrate it!
MJD

Thursday, April 30, 2009

Until Mike Likes Mike...

"You yourself, as much as anybody in the entire universe, deserve your love and affection."
~ Buddha

***
We become what we think about. Our thoughts control our actions. If we think positively, we get positive results. Negative thinking produces negative results. If you think you can, you can. If you think you can’t, you can’t. Put simply, failure to believe means failure to achieve

Belief is the foundation for all achievement. Belief comes from having self-confidence and/or self-esteem. Self confidence is task related. It comes from repetition and mastery of a specific thing. The more you do something, the better you should get at it. The better you get, the more self confident you become. Self-esteem on the other hand is a way of being. Self esteem is about liking oneself. It’s not a narcissistic, “Hey look at me,” type being; it’s about taking pride in yourself and having self-respect.

Those that posses both high self-esteem and self-confidence are no doubt primed to succeed. Those that possess high self-esteem, but low self-confidence may not necessarily succeed at a given task, but they’ll try anyway, and, will walk away with a positive experience. They know that the outcome of a specific task does not define who they are. Regardless of the outcome, the fact that they tried is personally satisfying. Moreover, they’ll look for the lessons to be learned from the outcome. The lessons will be used for self-development, which in turn fosters higher self esteem.

What about those people who have high self-confidence, but low self esteem. Professional athletes who fall from grace are often characterized by high self confidence and low self-esteem. Perhaps one of the best examples of a athlete falling from grace is Mike Tyson. Mike Tyson was a phenomenal prize fighter (boxer). He had great self- confidence as a boxer. Although Tyson’s self-confidence earned him a heavyweight championship and millions of dollars, his life was in shambles. Mike Tyson did not like Mike Tyson. Tyson did everything possible to sabotage his life. Mike Tyson earned over 300 million dollars over the course of his career; yet, he had to file bankruptcy. In addition, He was convicted and sent to prison in State of Indiana for a sexual assault offense.

When Tyson officially retired from boxing, he was quoted as saying, “My whole life has been a waste, I’m a failure.” Upon his retirement, Tyson attempted to get his life back on track; that is, until he was arrested again, this time for drunk driving and possession of narcotics. The man that people thought had everything; in actuality had nothing. Self-confidence without self-esteem can lead to material success; but will never lead to personal success and fulfillment. Until Mike likes Mike and develops a higher level of self-esteem, his life will continue to self-destruct.


How about you? Do you really like yourself? How's your self-esteem? The first step in developing higher self-esteem is accepting who you are you and where you are at in your life. It's about accepting responsibility for where you're at and moving forward. It's not about placing blame; blaming others or blaming circumstances. Placing blame allows you to shirk the responsibility for the necessity to make a change, and only perpetuates the current state of affairs. Next, it's about letting go of the heavy burdens of the past: the failures, the rejections and the embarrassments. It's about realizing what's done is done and that history cannot be changed. It's about living in the present and having faith that a better future awaits you. Developing higher self-esteem comes from believing that God created you as a unique person. It's impossible to develop self-esteem if your are denying your own uniqueness by trying to be like someone else. Shakespeare said it best in Hamlet, when Polonius said to Laertes, his son, "To thine Own Self Be True."

Tyson's rise and fall in the boxing profession teaches us a valuable lesson about life. Self-confidence is a situational belief that results in situational results. It speaks to the "state of affairs." Self-esteem, on the other hand, is a pervasive belief that defines your character, and your character will define your life. Self-esteem speaks to a "state of being."


It's Your Life: Live it, Love it, Celebrate it!
MJD

Thursday, April 16, 2009

A Lesson on Limitations

"Character cannot be developed in ease and quiet. Only through experience of trial and suffering can the soul be strengthened, ambition inspired, and success achieved."
—Helen Keller
***

Helen Keller was born June 27, 1880 in Tuscumbia, Alabama. Helen lived an active, normal life until nineteen months of age when she developed a high fever and became seriously ill. Although doctors did not offer much hope that Helen would live, Helen survived. Her illness left her blind and deaf.

As a young child, Helen acted out frequently. Her behavior was often so aggressive and violent that her family contemplated placing her in an institution. Helen’s mother refused to institutionalize her, and began seeking out people who might be able to help Helen.

Helen resisted communicating with others until Martha Washington, the daughter of the Keller's family cook, taught Helen how to communicate through sign language. Although Anne Sullivan is referred to as Helen’s “miracle worker,” it was young Martha Washington who first taught Helen that she could communicate with her outside world. Most communication specialists agree that the young Martha Washington’s had a profound influence in Helen Keller’s success.

At the age of six, Helen was introduced to Anne Sullivan. Anne Sullivan was a former student at the Perkins Institute for the Blind. Anne Sullivan, once completely blind herself, was able to gain partial vision after a series of medical operations. Anne was hired to be Helen’s teacher and continued to serve as Helen’s teacher, guardian and close companion until Anne's death in 1936.

At the age of twenty, Helen Keller enrolled in Radcliffe College. Four years later, she became the first blind person to earn a bachelors degree from a college. Helen Keller achieved many other extraordinary things in her lifetime, including: becoming a famous speaker and author; founding the Helen Keller International, a nonprofit organization for for vision, health and nutrition; helped found the American Civil Liberties Union (ACLU); traveled to 39 countries; and On September 14, 1964, President Lyndon B, Johnson awared her the Presidential Medal of Freedom, one of the nation’s highest civilian awards. In 1965, she was elected to the Women’s Hall of Fame at the New York World’s Fair. Helen Keller passed away at the age of 87 on June 1, 1968.

It’s true that Helen Keller success can be attributed to those who had an influence in her life; mainly her mother for not giving up on her; The young Martha Washington for teaching her communication was possible; and Anne Sullivan for inspiring her and teaching her that nothing was impossible. One can never overlook the value of mentors, teachers and supporters when looking at the success someone has achieved. No successful person has ever gone it alone. However, all the support and guidance in the world will be to no avail, if no will exists. It was Helen Keller’s desire to learn and her courage to overcome her physical limitations that was the driving force in her success. Helen refused to allow her physical limitation to foster self-limiting beliefs. Ultimately, she knew that her ability to communicate, read and learn depended upon what she believed to be possible.

How about you? Do you have the courage to face your limitations? Courage is acting in the face of fear. You can bet that Helen Keller had significant fears. Helen lived in a world of darkness. How frightful that must be to a young child. Helen’s physical limitations were beyond her control. Yet, she possessed the will to overcome her limitations. All too often, our limitations are not beyond or control. Rather, they are self-imposed. We’ve created these limitations by our self-talk. We’ve talked ourselves into limiting our full potential. Our negative self talk causes us to limit what we can we experience, which in turn, limits our ability to learn new things and grow. Our self-imposed restrictions generally originate from fear; fear that if played out, would be proven to be unfounded.

Helen Keller demonstrated to the world that limitations are only limitations if you allow them to be so. When you begin doubting yourself about whether you can or can't do something, take some time think about a little blind, deaf girl from Alabama who refused to limit herself and in turn moved a nation.

It's Your Life: Live it, Love it & Celebrate it!
MJD

Tuesday, March 17, 2009

Cutting Down the Nets

"If you stay here and believe, then we can do this."
-- John "Digger" Phelps



March Madness!  The NCAA tournament began March 13th.   Sixty eight teams began the tournament with their eyes on the coveted prize: the national championship.   Only four teams remain as 64 teams have now been sidelined.  Like any tournament there were favorites and underdogs; there were suspected blow-outs and shocking upsets.  A blow-out is easy to understand; one team is far superior than the other.  But, what about an upset?  The team that is not suppose to win, wins!  How is it that a team that is not suppose to win (the “underdog’) can pull off an upset?   There is one common element in every upset, the “underdog” believes what everyone else doesn’t; that being, the impossible is possible! 
The late Napoleon Hill said, “What ever the mind of man can conceive and believe it can achieve.”  No game exemplifies Hill’s statement better than the game played between the Notre Dame Fighting Irish and the UCLA Bruins in January of 1974 (contrary to popular belief, this game was not a NCAA tournament game).  UCLA was the number one ranked team at the time and was riding an 88 game winning streak.  The Bruins were coached by the legendary John Wooden.  The Fighting Irish were coached by a young coach by the name of Richard “Digger” Phelps.  Notre Dame had lost their previous four games to UCLA by a total of 128 points.  It was predicted that UCLA would win the upcoming game by more than 30 points.  One might think that the Fighting Irish would accept the fact that they didn’t stand a chance against the best team in college basketball.

Coach Phelps knew that has team did not stand a chance against the Bruins unless somehow he changed the mindset of his team.  Phelps knew that in order for the impossible to become possible, the Fighting Irish had to believe it to be possible.  Phelps contemplated; how could the Fighting Irish pull off the biggest upset in college basketball?   On Wednesday before the game, Coach Phelps was sitting in his office on the campus of Notre Dame.  He glanced at a picture on the wall of former Notre Dame standout, Austin Carr.  The picture showed Carr cutting down the nets after Notre Dame beat UCLA in 1971 (that game marked the last time UCLA suffered a loss in over three years).  

After starring at the picture, Phelps made the decision that his team would cut down the nets after practice.  The ritual of cutting down the nets is bestowed upon the winning team after winning a championship or after a major upset.  Coach Phelps knew his team had to develop a winning attitude.  He wanted his team to begin thinking and feeling like a championship team.  Phelps’ philosophy was think like a champion, play like a champion, and become a champion.  After practice, Phelps instructed each player that they would have a turn at cutting down the net.  One by one, players were hoisted up to the rim by their teammates.  Coach Phelps told his team, “This is what we’ll be doing when we beat UCLA this weekend.”  He went on to say, “Someday you will tell your grandchildren about this.”

After each practice leading up to the game, the Fighting Irish did the same thing; the nets were cut down.   When Phelps first instructed the players to cut down the nets, the majority of the players were skeptical of Coach Phelps’ tactic.   But, by the end of Friday's practice, each player took their turn cutting down the net down with an aura of confidence.  The Fighting Irish’s mindset had changed.  It didn’t matter what everybody else thought, the Irish believed they would beat UCLA and they knew that was all that mattered.

The first half had gone as everyone had predicted.  In fact, at one time, UCLA had a 17 point lead.  With 3:30 left to go in the game and the Irish down 70-59, things dramatically changed.   Coach Phelps called a time out.   With unwavering belief and passion, Phelps told his team, “If you don't believe that we can do this, then leave and go to the locker room right now.  But, if you stay here and believe, then we can do this."  The Fighting Irish believed!  Notre Dame scored the next 12 points while holding UCLA scoreless. The Fighting Irish made history by pulling off one the greatest upsets in sports history.  They put an end to UCLA’s winning streak; a winning streak that still stands today as the longest winning streak in men’s college basketball history.

Coach Phelps would likely tell you that the act of cutting the nets down in and of itself was not the reason the Fighting Irish beat UCLA.  They won the game because the Fighting Irish believed that they would win and they played like they would win.   Coach Phelps and his team didn’t buy into what all of the naysayers had to say.  Notre Dame did not enter the game against UCLA hoping to win, they expected to win.   Coach Phelps emphasized the importance of mental preparation.   He knew that when you go into a game with a defeatist attitude, you’ll come out defeated.   Plain and simple, if you think you can’t, you can’t!

In his book, Tales from the Notre Dame Hardwood, Coach Phelps describes how his players, at their 30 year reunion, talked about the impact that cutting down the nets had on their mental approach to the game.  Coach Phelps’ tactic worked; it created a positive outlook for all of the players and a belief what others thought couldn't be done, could be done. 

How about you?  In the game of life do you practice cutting down the nets?  Do you see yourself as successful?  Do you practice that winning attitude? Or, are you inclined to believe the naysayers?   Understand that when you believe the naysayers, the result is always the same; they’ll always be right and you’ll end up losing.  The cornerstone of achievement is passion and belief.  When you want something bad enough and believe it to be possible, you’ll create an expectation.   Having an expectation and the disciplined practice of pursuing that expectation will create the very results that you expect.

Become a champion and start cutting down your nets!   Today is the time to believe and achieve!

Scissors anyone!

It's your life: live it, love it, & celebrate it!
MJD

***

Friday, February 27, 2009

Let's Go Team!

“Individually, we are one drop. Together, we are an ocean."
- Ryunsuke Satoro

***
Rick Pitino is considered a successful and well respected basketball coach. He has coached at both the collegiate and professional levels. 1n 1996 he led the University of Kentucky to a national championship. Currently, Coach Pitino is the head basketball coach at the University of Louisville. Throughout his coaching career, Rick Pitino has demanded that his players understand the true meaning of teamwork.

The following story speaks to Coach Pitino’s teamwork philosophy. In 1985, Pitino accepted the head coaching job at Providence College. Many of his friends and colleages attempted to talk him out of taking the job. Because of the basketball atomosphere at Providence, many thought he was committing career suicide. The basketball program at Providence had struggled for years. There was no winning attitude, no sense of pride and no spirit of teamwork. Pitino set out to change all that.

During one of his initial meetings with the new team, Pitino wrote four words on a blackboard: basketball, academics, work ethic, and family. He told his players that these 4 variables were critical to the success of any basketball team.

After finishing writing on the chalkboard, Pitino turned to his players and asked, “How many of you want to be play in the NBA after college?” Immediately, each player raised a hand. Pitino responded, “You had a losing season last year and not one of you averaged more than 10 points a game. He erased the word basketball and told his players, “None of you would not be considered a success in basketball.”

Next, he said, “I've seen your grades, it's also obvious you aren't successful in your school work either. With that he erased the word academics.

He turned to the team’s trainer and asked the trainer how many players had been in the gym every day since the season ended to work on their game. "'Not one, Coach,” the trainer said. Pitino sternly admonished his players about their work ethic. He erased “work ethic” and said, “It’s apparent you don’t have a good work ethic.”

Coach Pitino said, “Let’s see, you would not be considered successful in basketball, you don’t apply yourself in the classroom and none of you have what would be considered a good work ethic… Hopefully, you're a close team and you care about each other.” With that a player by the name of Harold Starks quickly stood up and declared, “We're a close team, coach”

Pitino then asked Harold Starks, if his teammate, Steve Wright had any brothers. He followed that question with what does Billy Donovan’s father do for a living. Starks had no answer and responded, “Coach, I really don’t know.” He posed the questions to all of his players and not one player could answer his questions.

Pitino admonished his players by saying, “You really don’t know your teammates. You’re not a team, you‘re really just a collection of individuals pretending to be a team.” With that he made each player stand up and talk about himself and his family. Throughout the season, Pitino continued to focus on the principles of teamwork. Each player was expected to get to know one another on a personal level. The players began to learn that they were no longer teammates simply by the virtue of being on the same team; they were teammates because they got to know one another beyond a superficial level, they learned to care about one another and they shared a common goal: win basketball games by putting the team first. Pitino’s philosophy paid off: twenty-two months later, Providence College made it to the NCAA Final Four.

Rick Pitino knows that a successful team is a team with members that not only care about the mission of the team, but the members also care about one another. When Pitino inherited his players at Providence, they knew nothing of teamwork. Instead, they focused on what was best for themselves and as a result they were neither successful as a team, nor as an individual players. Once they grasped the true meaning of teamwork, the team became better, they became better teammates, they became better players, and, more importantly,they became better people.

How about you? What teams are you on? Remember, any number of individuals with a common purpose can constitute a team. Think about your family, friends, work, clubs, and organizations. What type of team member are you? Do you genuinely care about your team members? Or, are you on the team for the sole benefit of what best suits your needs. Rick Pitino’s first year at Providence should teach all of us a lesson in teamwork. In order for a team to be successful, each member must be committed to perfecting their talent, pursuing knowledge, displaying a solid work ethic and caring for and supporting one another.

The next time you get together with your team, embrace Pitino’s philosophy for team success. I can't guarantee success on the level of a national championship, but I can guarantee that both you and your team will be better off for trying.

Let’s go team!

It’s your life: Live it, Love it & Celebrate it!
MJD

Thursday, February 19, 2009

The Cinderella Man

"I have to believe that when things are bad, I can change them."
- Jim Braddock

***

Jim Braddock, known as the Cinderella Man, made one of the greatest comebacks in boxing history. Braddock was a light heavyweight boxer in the 1920’s. By 1926, Braddock had established himself as fierce competitor with a promising future. In 1929 Jim Braddock was living the good life as a professional boxer. He was offered a shot at the light heavyweight title against the reigning champion, Tommy Loughran. Braddock lasted 15 rounds against the champion, but the decision ended up going to the defending champion.

Two months after the fight with Loughran, the stock market crashed and Braddock eventually lost everything. With boxing as his only source of income, Braddock continued to box. However, the loss to Loughran seemed to have destroyed Braddock’s confidence and passion to box. Lacking confidence and passion, he lost the majority of his fights. After he shattered his right hand in a match, Braddock decided to quit boxing. Without a job, Braddock filed for government assistance. The only work Braddock could find was performing odd jobs on a local loading docks. Out of work, with little food and no heat in their apartment, Braddock was forced to rediscover family values. With a new found focus on his family, Jim Braddock made supporting his family his number one concern. Braddock could no longer dwell on his fall from wealth and fame. He was facing the most important challenge he'd ever encounter in his life; making a better life for his wife and two children.

Braddock’s boxing manager never gave up on Braddock, and in 1934 Braddock got a big break. His manager was able to get Braddock a fight on the undercard for the heavyweight championship between Max Baer and Primo Canera at Madison Square Garden. Nobody gave Braddock a chance to win the fight; he had been out of professional boxing for a few years and he would be fighting in the heavyweight classification; Braddock a light heavyweight by stature was significantly underweight compared to heavyweight fighters. Braddock knew that a victory would be the beginning of that better life he envisoned for his family. Jim Braddock was no longer fighting for himself, he was now fighting for his family. With a rekindled passion for boxing and a compelling reason to fight, Braddock surprised the boxing community when he knocked out his opponent in the third round. Braddock’s victory earned him additional bouts against ranked boxers. Braddock continued to defeat his opponents and earned the nickname, “Cinderella Man.” The “Cinderalla Man” was making one of the biggest comebacks in sports history. His comeback came at a time when a nation needed it the most. The nation needed a national hero. Braddock once down and out was making a comeback. His comeback represented the hope of every American; they too would make a comeback and would emerge from the Great Depression, better than ever.


On June 13, 1935, The "Cinderella Man" entered the ring against heavyweight champion, Max Baer. Baer was favored to win 10-1. The "Cinderella man" pulled off one of the greatest upsets in sports history when he scored a unanimous decision over Baer. The "Cinderalla Man" was now the heavyweight champion of the world.

Braddock story is more than a story about a comeback athlete. More importantly, it’s a story about values. Braddock’s story teaches us about a man’s love for his family. Braddock knew that it was his responsibility to take care of his family. It was his love and commitment to his family that gave him the inner strength to get back into the ring and defy all odds. How about you? Does your love for your family inspire you? Braddock was down and out, yet his love for his family allowed him to maintain his focus on what was most important thing in his life, his family.

Jim Braddock’s story teaches us about that the power that can be unleashed if you believe in yourself. Braddock refused to accept what other people were saying about him; that he was washed up and could no longer fight. To Braddock, only one person’s opinion mattered, and that was his. If Braddock would have bought into the opinions of others, it’s likely he never would have made it back into the ring, let alone claim the heavyweight championship of the world. How about you? Are you letting what others say about you preventing you from reaching your championship potential?

Braddock's story teaches us about perseverance. Braddock refused to "throw in the towel." In boxing, when a fighter throws in the towel, it signifies acceptance of defeat. Braddock wasn’t about to throw in towel. With no job, little money and out of boxing, Jim Braddock refused to fell sorry for himself and blame the world for his unfortunate circumstances. Instead, Braddock accepted responsibility for his current state of affairs and decided to do something about it. Braddock used his adverse situation as a catalyst to resurrect his boxing career. How about you, when things go wrong, do you blame others or do you accept the responsibility for the event that you created. It’s only when you accept responsibility for an event that you can then use event as a catalyst to become a better person.


The best thing a person can do is come to grips with the fact that they are where they are at in their life, because of the choices they made or didn't make, because of the things they did or didn’t do, because of the things they said or didn’t say. When a person accepts responsibility for their life and comes to realize that are the sole author of their own life, it's then and only then that they can begin re-writing the script to becoming a better person.

It's your life: live it, love it & celebrate it!
MJD

Tuesday, January 20, 2009

Making the Dream a Reality - MLK


 “The ultimate measure of a man is not where he stands in moments of comfort and convenience, but where he stands at times of challenge and controversy.”
— Dr. Martin Luther King Jr.

***
There are several people I view as a hero.  One such is person is Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr.  Dr. King had the steadfast courage to take on a nation in social turmoil.  He took on a nation that espoused equality in the form of the Bill of Rights, but in practice, came no where near hitting the mark.  Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr. was incessant in the pursuit of his "Dream."  He saw a better America for all of us.  He envisioned an America where equality triumphs over inequality, where tolerance triumphs over prejudice, where acceptance triumphs over rejection, where love triumphs over hate, and good triumphs over evil.

This past Monday our nation honored Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr.  Individually, we can do our part to honor him by making a conscious effort to make Dr. King's dream become a reality.  Dr. King's vision of a better America goes way beyond the colors of black and white.  He stood for equality for all.  Martin Luther King, Jr. should be remembered as a man who moved a nation through courage and faith and out of love for all of mankind.  Dr. King realized that when we treat each other with dignity and respect, we not only demonstrate civility and kinsmenship, we in turn, grow as a person. 

The following is a quote that speaks to the heart of Dr. King's philosophy:

"We could learn a lot from crayons: some are sharp, some are pretty, some are dull, some have weird names, and all are different colors ...but they all have to learn to live in the same box."
-- Author Unknown

Remember, not only do crayons live in the same box, when they work together, they are capable of creating a masterpiece!

It's Your Life: Live it, Love it & Celebrate it!
MJ
D