"Triple Filter Test"

“He gossips habitually; he lacks the common wisdom to keep still that deadly enemy of man, his own tongue”
-- Mark Twain

***

Socrates lived in ancient Greece (469 - 399 BC) and is known for his influence on Western philosophy. Socrates was committed to searching for the truth and that which was “good.” He was so devout in his quest for the truth, that he would not allow someone to give him information about another person without having passed his “triple filter test.”

The first of the three filters is Truth. Socrates would ask the person, “Have you made absolutely sure that what you are about to tell me is true?" Even if the information was not known to be true, Socrates would cautiously proceed to the second filter

The second filter is Goodness. Socrates would ask, “Is what you are about to tell me about this person something good?" If the information was considered to be bad, Socrates would proceed to the third filter even more cautiously.

The third filter is Usefulness. Socrates would ask, “Is what you are about to tell me going to be useful to me?" If the information was bad news, not known to be true, and not useful to Socrates, he would refused to listen to it.

Talk about wisdom of the ages, the “Triple Filter Test” may be one of the best. Every parent should teach the “Triple filter Test” to their children. If we learned at an early age to search for the truth and only look for the good in others, just think of the type of world we would live in; no more gossip, no more rumors. Schools would see less bullying and happier children. Work places would be less negative and more productive. Neighborhoods would see less conflict and more cooperation.

How about you? When you talk about others could your information pass the “Triple Filter Test?” Do you make sure your information is factual? Is your information good news? Is your information useful? I urge you to put any message about someone else to the filter test.

Now that you are aware of the Triple filter test, let today be the day that you begin using the Socratic method of searching for the truth and the good in people. Remember, the most important filter is the first, the truth. If what you speak of is not known to be true, you should be hesitant to speak unless your message can pass the second filter; that which good. If your message is not known to be true and certainly is not good news; stop right there! If the wisdom of the “Triple Filter Test” is not enough, remember that the Good Book tells us that we shall not bear false witness against our neighbors.

Think of how much better the world would be, if parents and schools taught, reinforced, and modeled the simplistic, yet powerful “Triple Filter Test.”

Here is to getting an A+ on your test!

***
Its your life: Live it, Love it & Celebrate it!

Hustle & Bustle

"Peace. It does not mean to be in a place where there is no noise, trouble or hard work. It means to be in the midst of those things and still be calm in your heart."
-- Unknown

***

One would not characterized the weeks before Christmas as peaceful; it is anything but. You often hear of, "The hustle and bustle of Christmas." There are cards to send, decorations to set up, gifts to buy, gifts to wrap, cookies to bake, the list goes on!

Why do so many find it difficult to find peace at Christmas? After all, Christmas is suppose to be a time of hope, peace and goodwill. Maybe it is because we tend to lose focus of the real reason for the season. Each year, the secular version of Christmas seems to become more important than the spiritual version. It seems the more secular Christmas becomes, the more we have to "hustle and bustle." The more we "hustle and bustle," the more anxiety we experience. Anxiety and peace are polar opposites, and it is impossible to experience peace when you anxious.

This year when the "hustle and bustle" of the seasons starts to take it toll on you, spend a little time with spiritual version of Christmas. The Great Teacher once said, "Peace I leave with you; my peace I give you." This Christmas if you seek peace amongst the noise, trouble and hard work of the season, put Christ back into Christmas. Remember, when the Christ child was born there was a multitude of heavenly hosts saying, "Glory to God in the highest, and on earth peace, good will toward men."

Peace!

***
Its your life: Live it, Love it & Celebrate it!

Someday: A Lesson on Living

“I don't want to get to the end of my life and find that I live just the length of it. I want to have lived the width of it as well.”

- Diane Ackerman

***

Everything in the world has a polar opposite: there cannot be light without darkness; there cannot be love without hatred; there cannot be peace with war; there cannot be life without death.

There cannot be life without death. From the day we took our first breath, we were born to die. But, before we can die, we must live. Are you truly living your life? I ask you, would you live your life differently, if you were told your life expectancy was less than six months? Would you stop complaining about people and things and start appreciating them? Would you do the things you always wanted to do but have never found the time? Would you mend a broken relationship? Would you truly live in the moment and not worry about yesterday or tomorrow?

I do not pose these questions in a morbid sense. To the contrary, I pose these questions to make you think about living your life. Life holds but one guarantee, and that guarantee is that someday we will die. The question is: when is someday? Because we cannot predict when someday will happen, doesn’t it make sense to live each day as if it were our last? You would forget about the past and not worry about the future. A grudge would no longer serve any purpose. You would not let urgent things crowd out the important things in your life. And, you would learn to appreciate every single moment for what it was worth.

I have heard far too many people say, “If only I can get through this day.” That is not living. That is reactive participation. If you lived each day like it was your last day, you certainly would not be saying, "If only I can get through this day." lnstead, you would be saying, “What can I get from this day.” I urge you to live each day, each moment to its fullest. In the song, Live Like We’re Dying, performed by Kris Allen and written by the Scripts , the lyricists tell us:

Looking at the hands of the time we've been given
If this is all we got and we gotta start thinking
If every second counts on a clock that's ticking
Gotta live like we're dying

You have no control over the length of your life, but you certainly have control over the width of your life – so begin living today and everyday as if it where you last. And, when your someday comes, your life will be a tribute to a lesson on living!

***

It's your life: Live it, Love it & Celebrate it!
MJD

Gratitude: Pilgrim Style

“Thanksgiving Day comes, by statute, once a year; to the honest man it comes as frequently as the heart of gratitude will allow.”

-- Edward Sandford Martin

 *** When you think about it we have so much more than the pilgrims when they first celebrated Thanksgiving. But, what does “more” really mean? Indeed, today we live in a materialistic world; a world designed to make work easier and leisure time more enjoyable. Believe it or not, the pilgrims lived in a materialistic world too. However, the material things they possessed were used solely for survival and sustenance. For sure, life was not easy for the early settlers. They barely survived their first New England winter. It is estimated that half of the settlers died from starvation or scurvy. Yet, they were grateful for what they felt gave meaning to life: faith, family, friends,and hard work. In 1621, with the help of their Native American neighbors, the pilgrims celebrated their first “harvest home,” known to us as our “Thanksgiving.” In a letter to a friend in England,Colonist Edward Winslow wrote of the “harvest home” celebration. He concluded his letter with: 

"And although it be not always so plentiful as it was at the time with us, yet by the goodness of God, we are so far from want, that, we often wish you partakers of our plenty." 

There is no question that we live in a world that no pilgrim could have ever imagined. We live in a world of full of abundant resources and unprecedented opportunity. Yet, far too often we take too many things for granted. Not so for the pilgrims; they knew that it was God that provided for them. Hence, it was God’s provisions that they were most grateful for. The pilgrims benefited from the law of gratefulness: Being grateful for something actually attracts more of what you are grateful for.

The pilgrims were grateful for their relationship with God. It was because of their gratefulness that their faith continued to grow despite the adversity they faced day in and day out. Their faith in God gave them hope; hope for a better tomorrow.
The pilgrims were grateful for their skills that helped them survive; courage, determination, perseverance and creativity. It was because of their gratefulness that they remained optimistic. Their optimism allowed them to develop and improve the skills that made survival and their way of life a little easier.

The pilgrims were grateful for their neighbors, the Native Americans. It was because of their gratefulness that they were able to develop a relationship with a group of people who taught them how to survive off the land.

The pilgrims were grateful for each other. It was because of their gratefulness that they were able to develop a community; a community that not only fostered survival, but fostered harmony and productivity too.

The pilgrims were also grateful for their freedom. It was because of their gratefulness that they toiled and fought diligently to retain what they held so precious; the right to be free.

So there you have it, a lesson from the pilgrims: If you want to experience more of something, you must be grateful for what you already have. If you want to experience more love in your life, you must be grateful for the love that you already have. If you want to experience more meaningful relationships, you must be grateful for the relationships that you have already formed. If you want to experience greater peace, you must be grateful for the peace that already exists. If you want to experience more success, you must be grateful for the successes that you have obtained thus far.

This Thanksgiving, I urge you to practice an “attitude of gratitude.” You can do this by taking some time to reflect on those things in your life that you are grateful for. Believe me; we all have many, many things to be thankful for Because, we all have been abundantly blessed by “the Goodness of God,” this exercise should take a little time. Next, commit to a no complaining day. Complaining is the opposite of being grateful. Just like being grateful, you’ll get more of what you complain about too. When you find yourself complaining (in thought or in word) about somebody or something, do the following: immediately stop complaining, say the word, “but,” and find something positive about the person or thing that you are complaining about. If you practice being grateful and eliminate the complaining in your life, you will find that you’ll get more of what you want and less of what you do not want.

Remember, if the pilgrims were able to survive and flourish in the 1600’s by practicing gratitude just think of what you can do today in the land of opportunity and plenty! Wishing you a Happy and Blessed Thanksgiving!

It's your life: live it, love it & celebrate it!
MJD

The Right Ingredient

"Gratitude can transform common days into thanksgivings, turn routine jobs into joy, and change ordinary opportunities into blessings."

-- William Arthur Ward

***

Just as a dish can go from bland to delectable by adding the right ingredient, your life can be transformed by adding the right ingredient too. The right ingredient is gratitude. If you want to make the common, routine and ordinary something special, just add a little gratitude. You can't go wrong!

***
Its your life: Live it, Love it & Celebrate it!
MJD

Imagine That

"There are enough genuine difficulties in life to encounter, don't allow your imagination to increase the number."
-- Neil Eskelin

***

Life is tough. It is supposed to be. Its through challenges and adversity that we grow. Eskelin is right on point! There will be enough genuine problems in life that we do not need to create more for ourselves by conjuring them up. An imagination fueled by fear will most certainly create difficulties for us. We will conjure up all kinds of things. The more we fear, the more we imagine. We will imagine things that will paralyze our hopes and dreams. We will imagine things that will inhibit us from beginning something new and we will imagine things that will convince it is time to quit something that is worthwhile.

Imagination is a gift. Innovations, Inventions and breakthroughs have all been spawned by the power of imagination. Imagination allows one to see things differently than what exists at the present. Our imagination should serve us, not hinder us. When we allow fear to control our imagination. We begin to move in the direction of creating the type of circumstances we fear most. The Good Book says, ""That which I feared most has come upon me."

Today is the day to stop letting your imagination create difficulties for you. Instead, let your imagination create circumstances designed to improve your lot and make life easier for you. It is important to remember the words of Franklin D. Roosevelt, "There is nothing to fear but fear itself."

Let the Power of Imagination work for you - Imagine a better tomorrow!

***
It's Your Life: Live it, Love it, Celebrate it!
MJD

Passion Play

“Failure is impossible.”
-- Susan B. Anthony

***

Talk about having passion, Susan B. Anthony could easily be the poster child for "Passion." One hundred thirty eight (138) years ago today, Susan Brownell Anthony, marched into a Rochester, New York voting precinct and cast her vote in the 1872 presidential election. The problem was it was illegal for women to vote. She was arrested for knowingly voting without a lawful right, and was subsequently fined $100; a fine which she refused to pay.

Susan B. Anthony believed that the legal, political, and social inequities American women suffered were due to the fact that women lacked the right to vote. Susan B. Anthony was determined that woman should, and one day would be granted the right to vote. Believing that nothing was impossible, Susan B. Anthony quickly emerged as the leader of the Women’s suffrage movement. Susan B. Anthony worked fervently and tirelessly for the cause up until her death in 1906. One month before her death, she was quoted as saying, “Failure is impossible.” Fourteen years after her death, the 19th amendment was passed and women won the right to vote.

How about you? Do you believe that failure is impossible? It all comes down to passion and belief. Susan B. Anthony was passionate about women’s suffrage. Her passion fueled the belief that someday women would vote.

Passion, Passion, Passion! The more passionate you become about something, the more you believe in it. The more you believe in something, the more the impossible becomes possible. How does the impossible become possible? It is because of Passion! Passion is emotion and emotion is energy; the more passionate you are about something, the more energy that is generated. Passion becomes energy that keeps you going when the critics and naysayers say it cannot be done. Passion becomes energy that allows you ignore distractions and stay focused on your goal. Passion becomes energy that gives you the physical strength to keep going when others would have quit long ago.

You cannot have success without first having passion. The impossible can never become possible without passion. I’ve seen far too many people, who because of a lack passion, “go through the motions.” “Going through the motions,” at best, will get you average or ordinary results. You can bet that Susan B. Anthony did not just go through the motions. Susan B. Anthony’s passion for women’s suffrage and the passage of the 19th Amendment had a significant impact on American History and our nation as it exists today.

Remember, those that lack passion tend to see the possible as being impossible; whereas, people with passion see the impossible as possible. Don’t believe me; think of the millions of women who voted on Tuesday.

***
It's your life: Live it, Love it & Celebrate it!
MJD

"Do-or-Die"

“Ones best success comes after their greatest disappointments.”
-- Henry Ward Beecher

***

In sports you will often hear the term, “Do-or-Die.” “Do-or-Die” means an athlete or team must succeed at something in order to avoid defeat, elimination, and/or failure. A “Do-or-Die” event is easily identifiable and is determined solely by the outcome. For example, Team A must win in order to make the playoffs. Team A finds themselves in a “Do-or-Die” situation. If Team A loses, they will be eliminated from contention.

“Do-or Die” situations do not just take place in athletic contests. “Do-or-Die” situations can and do occur in our everyday lives. Personal “Do-or-Die” situations are determined by how much value we place on the outcome of an event. If we place a great deal of value on the outcome of an event, it is possible to have manifested a “Do-or-Die” situation for ourselves. The problem with a personal “Do-or-Die” situation is the sole focus is on the outcome; it is you win or you lose, it is “we do” or “we die.” The problem with self-manifested “Do-or-Die” events is the tendency to believe that the outcome of a single event determines our fate.

“Do-or- Die” situations have their place in athletic competitions, but have no place in our personal lives. In order to declare a winner in an athletic competition, someone has to win and someone has to lose. That’s the nature of competition and keeping score.

In your personal life, your fate is not foretold by a single event. Sure, nobody likes to be defeated, eliminated, or fail. However, it is not the outcome of a single event that counts. It is the person you become in the process that really counts.

Remember that life is a series of ups and downs, and things happen for a reason. I urge you to be patient and do not create “Do-or-Die” situations for yourself. Sure, you may not have got the big promotion you had hope for; you may not have got accepted into the college you had hope for, or your mate may have broke of the relationship with you; it is not the end of the world. Always remember, things happen for a reason.

To illustrate, my daughter, Taylor, got cut from the volleyball team her freshman year in high school. At first, it appeared that the sun was not going to rise the next day, or ever for that matter. But, things happen for a reason. She spent that season (volleyball) working on developing her softball skills. By the end of her freshman season, she was brought up to the varsity team. She started the next three years. By the end of her senior season, she had accumulated numerous awards and honors. Getting cut from the volleyball team was actually a good thing. Although at the time, it would have been impossible for her to comprehend such a thing. Why? It is because making the volleyball team became a “Do-or- Die” situation for her.

I bet if you look back on your life, you’ll find that you have created a few “Do-or-Die” situations yourself. I ask you, out of those situations, how many times did things turn out just fine, or perhaps even better than you could have imagined?

Keep in mind that when you create “Do-or-Die” situations, you burden yourself with unnecessary stress and anxiety, and with stress and anxiety comes petulance, loss of focus, fatigue and excessive worry. Psychologists have demonstrated the mild anxiety can facilitate performance. However, excessive anxiety is a detriment to performance. There is nothing mild about a “Do-or-Die” situation.

Because the focus of a “Do-or-Die” situation is on future results, one denies themselves the enjoyment of the present moment. Minutes, hours, days and months go by when you are caught up in the future; a future that we really don’t have any control over. All we really have is the present moment. Therefore, the only thing we can control is the present moment. It is the present moment that will shape our future. When you assign a “Do-or-Die” status to an event, it marks the beginning of missing out on what is really important in life; the here, the now. I’m not saying that you should not plan for the future. Yes, you set goals and work hard to achieve them. What I am saying is never allow an event to become a “Do-or-Die” situation.

Agreed! No more “Do-or-Die” situations; leave those to athletic competitions. There will be times when you have put forth good effort and things will not work out as you had hoped for. Remember, something better awaits you. Effort never goes unrewarded; sometimes it just takes a little time.

***
It's your life: Live it, Love it & Embrace it!
MJD

Look Beyond

“It’s judgment that prevents us from seeing the good that lies beyond the appearance."
-- Wayne Dyer

***
Kent Nerburn is a highly acclaimed author of several books. Being a well known author requires travel. One day while traveling across Canada on a train, Nerburn learned the value of withholding judgment. During the trip, he took notice of an elderly man whom the other passengers were clearly avoiding. The old man was talking with slurred speech and had an unstable gait. Nerburg, like the other passengers, assumed the elderly man was a common drunk.

Nonetheless, Nerburg decided to strike up a conversation with the “old drunk.” Almost Immediately, Nerburg could tell this man was not a drunkard. It was not long into the conversation that Nerburg learned that the old man was recovering from a stroke. The man sitting next to him was actually an engineer who had commandeered many trains on the very tracks they were traveling. For the remainder of the journey the two of them talked. Nerburg was absolutely fascinated by the stories and tales being told by the old man. What Nerburg anticipated to be a long, dull ride, suddenly became much shorter and enlightening.

At the end of their journey, the old man thanked Nerburg for doing what nobody else would do; talk to him. Nerburg thanked the old man for sharing his time and life stories with him. As Newburg walked away from the train station he could not help but feel, both enlightened and grateful for the opportunity to share a ride with an intelligent, wise and charming old man; the same man that the other passengers chose to avoid.

How about you? Do you look beyond, or do allow your initial perceptions to create your reality. Everyday we make assessments of people and things. Often times, we make these assessments without having accurate or complete information. We are quick to assess, and even quicker to judge.

Let Kent Nerburg’s story serve as a lesson for you. The next time you look at another person, look beyond what you first see; ignore the outside and focus on the inside. Instead of finding every reason to avoid someone, first choose to like them. Like first and ask questions later. We don’t give people a fair chance when we allow our assumptions, notions, and stereotypes to dictate our reality.

Human beings don’t like to be wrong. Hence, we look for ways to validate what we believe to be true. Because of this phenomenon, we trick ourselves into a false reality. We want to be right, but we couldn’t be more wrong. Nerburg’s story illustrates the point. Every other passenger on the train assumed the old man was a drunk. His speech and gait clearly gave it away. Because he was a drunk, they avoided him. The other passengers who would not give the old man the time of day easily became fatigued with a cross-county train ride that seemed to last forever. Not Nerburg, Nerburg felt refreshed! While the other passengers engaged in trivial matters to pass the time, Nerburg spent his time being amused and enlightened. I ask you, who was right?

Nerburg's story certainly highlights the classic idiom, "Never judge a book by its cover." Remember when you judge a book by its cover, you could be choosing to miss out on a masterpiece.

Look Beyond!

***
It’s your life: Live it, Love it & Celebrate it!
MJD

Making a Donation

"The measure of a life, after all, is not its duration, but its donation."
~Corrie ten Boom

***

What you get out of life is in direct proportion to what you put into life. You have no control over the duration of your life, but you do have control over your donation to life. Once you fully understand that you are where you are at in your life because of your own doing, you begin to harness the power to create the life you wish to attain. The theory is pretty simplistic, yet it can be life-changing: Donate positive, get positive; donate negative, get negative; donate much, get much; donate little, get little.

I ask you, what type of donation will you make today.

***
It's Your Life: Live it, Love it, Celebrate it!
MJD

Fable of the Porcupine

"The best thing to hold onto in life is each other."
-- Audrey Hepburn
***

Today's inspiration was sent to me by a person who has been an inspiration in my life, my brother, Pat. Thanks big brother!

***

Fable of the porcupine:
It was the coldest winter ever and many animals died because of the cold. Some porcupines, realizing the gravity of the situation, decided to group together to share warmth. This way they were better covered and protected; however - the quills of each one wounded their closest companions. After a while they decided to distance themselves one from the other and soon after they began to die, alone and frozen. So they had to make a choice: either accept the quills of their companions or disappear from the Earth. Wisely, they decided to go back to being together. They learned to accept the little wounds that were caused by these close relationships, in order to benefit from what their companions offered. It was this way that they were able to survive and thrive. Moral of the Story:The best relationships are not ones that bring together perfect beings, but are instead ones where individuals learn to live with the imperfections of others and can still accept the gifts they have to offer.

***

Today, make it a point to look for and focus on the good in others.

***
It's Your Life: Live it, Love it, Celebrate it!
MJD

A Bright Light

"Whenever you see darkness, there is extraordinary opportunity for the light to burn brighter."
- Bono

***

Look about you and determine where your light should burn a little brighter.
When one candle lights another, instantaneously the light becomes brighter. Two lit candles produce more light and more energy than one.

Today, look for someone in need and light their candle with your light. Remember a candle does not lose its light by lighting another candle.

Keep your light burning brightly!

***
It's Your Life: Live it, Love it, Celebrate it!
MJD

When Losing is a Good Thing

Your success or failure in life will not be decided by the number of setbacks you encounter, but rather how you react to them.
-Unknown
***
Tonight our eighth-grade football team suffered its first defeat of the season, losing 12 – 8. We did not play a very good first half, which resulted in being down 6-0 at halftime. At halftime we told our players if you want to win, you have to believe you can; you have to have the expectation that you will win; and you have to play with passion and desire to turn your belief and expectation into a reality.

We came out and completely dominated the second half on both sides of football, until our opponent scored on a 95 yard touchdown run with 3 minutes remaining in the game. Our players, indeed, played the second half with passion and desire. We were a completely different team and it showed.

Needless to say, our players, coaches and parents were disappointed with the outcome of the game. We had it won. Unfortunately, big plays (95 yd touchdown run) are a part of football. And in some games, the better team does not win because of a big play or two.

When addressing the players at the end of the game, I told them how proud if was of them for they way they responded in the second half. Former college football coach, Lou Holtz once said, “How you respond to the challenge in the second half will determine what you become after the game, whether you are a winner or a loser.” Although the scoreboard did not declare us winners, our players’ effort certainly did!

I informed the players that although I don't like to lose, a loss can be positive. Positive only if lessons are learned. I asked the players to remember the moment. Remember the sinking feeling, the disappointment, and the hurt of a loss. I wanted them to remember the feeling to serve as the motivator to work hard in the future to avoid such feelings again. I informed the players that if they learn from this loss, and become a better football player, the loss can be a good thing.

When the disappointment fades and our players are ready to learn from the loss, growth will take place. In junior high football, there are 32 minutes of actual playing time. 32 minutes does not seem like a lot of time, but within that 32 minutes there are plenty of lessons about life to be learned. Lessons learned tonight include: the importance of preparation, the importance of belief, the importance of passion, the importance of perseverance, the importance of teamwork, and at the "drop of a hat" things can change dramatically.

Hopefully the biggest lesson our players will learn from tonight is that setbacks are only temporary. Temporary if you learn a lesson(s) and apply the lesson(s) in your life. Temporary because the setback can become the catalyst for growth and development. Failure, losses and setbacks are natural part of the growing process. The more one grows and develops, the better overall person that person becomes. When you become a better person; you become a better parent, better child, better student, better employee, better friend, better neighbor, and even a better stranger. When you become better, you are in a position to make everyone around you better too.

I don’t like to lose. But, if a loss makes our players better football players, and, more importantly, better people, then a loss is a good thing. And so it is with you, look to turn your losses into wins. We all have them. Remember, its what you do with the loss that really counts!

***
It's your life: Live it, Love it, & Celebrate it!
MJD

You Never Know

"No act of kindness, no matter how small,is ever wasted."
- Aesop

***
Howard was a poor student who was forced to sell goods door to door in order to put himself through school. One day while selling goods, Howard felt especially fatigued, tired and hungry. He thought if he could get something to eat, he would then have enough energy to complete his sales route for the day. The problem was Howard only had one dime in his pocket. Howard decided that he would politely ask his next sales prospect for some food. After knocking on the door, Howard was greeted by a lovely young woman, immediately he lost his nerve to ask for food.

Instead of asking for food, Howard asked for a glass of water. The woman recognizing Howard’s condition bought him a tall glass of milk instead. Howard gratefully accepted the milk and asked the woman, "How much do I owe you?"

The woman responded, "You don't owe me anything. My mother taught us to never to accept pay for a kindness." Howard replied, "Then I thank you from my heart." After leaving the house, Howard felt a renewed sense of energy, both physically and spiritually. For earlier, Howard had thought about giving up and quitting school.

Years later, the young woman became seriously ill. The doctors in her home town, never having seen such a case before, referred her to hospital specialists in a large metropolitan area. After an initial consultation, hospital doctors requested that Dr. Howard Kelly review the patient’s records and case. After reviewing the patient’s records, Dr. Kelly recognized the name and home town of the patient. He thought to himself, could this really be the lady that was so kind to me when I was down and out and ready to quit school. When Dr. Kelly walked into the patient’s room, he knew it was her. After leaving the patient’s room, Dr. Kelly decided that this case would receive his special attention. He was determined that this woman would live.

Dr. Kelly did give special attention to the case and after an arduous battle, the woman recovered. Dr. Kelly demanded that the business office send the woman’s bill to him to for approval. After reviewing the bill, Dr. Kelley wrote a small note on the bill and requested that the bill be hand-delivered to the patient. Upon receiving the bill, the woman opened it with trepidation. Because of her long hospital stay, she feared she would never have the means to pay the bill. After quickly scanning the bill, her eyes were drawn to a hand written note signed by Dr. Howard Kelly. The note read: "PAID IN FULL WITH ONE GLASS OF MILK..."

What random act of kindness will you engage in today? All too often, we fail to understand the impact that a smile can be to a stranger, what some spare change can mean to the needy, or how a helping hand can uplift someone requiring assistance. Simple, random acts of kindness can have a significant impact in the lives of others. Most often you will never know the degree of impact. In the case of the young woman, unbeknownst to her, her kindness had a significant impact on Dr. Kelley’s life and hers. Why don’t we engage in random acts of kindness more often? Because we get so caught up in our own world that we fail to recognize when and where kindness should be extended, or we believe that we just don’t have time to extend it.

When you extend kindness with no expectation of something in return, you invoke the power of the reciprocity principle. Simply put, “you get what you give.” When you extend kindness, kindness will be extended to you. The principle of reciprocity is not time bound. It may take years for an act of kindness to return to you. It will return, believe me! Remember, a glass of milk helped save a women’s life.

I urge you to be more cognizant of those around you. For if you do, you will see plenty of people who can benefit from a kind word or deed, and ultimately, the world will be a much kinder place to live.

Dr. Howard Kelly was a distinguished physician who, in 1895, founded the Johns Hopkins Division of Gynecologic Oncology at Johns Hopkins University

***
Its your life: Live it, Love it & Celebrate it!
MJD

Anyway

People are often unreasonable, irrational, and self-centered. Forgive them anyway.

If you are kind, people may accuse you of selfish, ulterior motives. Be kind anyway.

If you are successful, you will win some unfaithful friends and some genuine enemies. Succeed anyway.

If you are honest and sincere people may deceive you. Be honest and sincere anyway.

What you spend years creating, others could destroy overnight. Create anyway.

If you find serenity and happiness, some may be jealous. Be happy anyway.

The good you do today, will often be forgotten. Do good anyway.

Give the best you have, and it will never be enough. Give your best anyway.

In the final analysis, it is between you and God. It was never between you and them anyway.

***

There appears to be some disagreement as to who authored "Anyway." Some believe that the verses were written by Dr. Keith Kent and were titled, The Paradoxical Commandments. Whereas, others believe that Mother Theresa is responsible for the writing. Sources say the verses where written on the wall in her bedroom in Calcutta, India.

Regardless of who penned the verses, the verses remind us to do the right thing anyway. At times, life can be difficult, contentious, and upsetting. When we do the right thing anyway, we are sure to find peace and happiness along the way. Remember, you cannot control the thoughts or feelings of anyone other than yourself. Don't let others discourage you, distract you or dissuade you from doing the right thing. Since the verses were found to have been written on the bedroom wall of a woman who has been beautified and is regarded as blessed, we all should take heed, anyway!

***
It's Your Life: Live it, Love it, Celebrate it!
MJD

"Just Do it"

“The greatest danger in life is permitting the urgent things to crowd out the important things.”
~ Charles Hummel

***

Awhile ago I had read the following story. The story is somber. Although the story is contrary to my usual motivational and inspirational publishings, the message is quite compelling and provides one of life’s most important lessons.

The story is written by Anne Wells:

My brother-in-law opened the bottom drawer of my sister's bureau and lifted out a tissue-wrapped package.

"This," he said, "is not a slip. This is lingerie."

He discarded the tissue and handed me the slip. It was exquisite: silk, handmade and trimmed with a cobweb of lace. The price tag with an astronomical figure on it was still attached.

"Jan bought this the first time we went to New York, at least eight or nine years ago. She never wore it. She was saving it for a special occasion. Well, I guess this is the occasion."
He took the slip from me and put it on the bed with the other clothes we were taking to the mortician.

His hands lingered on the soft material for a moment. Then he slammed the drawer shut and turned to me.

"Don't ever save anything for a special occasion. Every day you're alive is a special occasion.

I remembered those words through the funeral and the days that followed. I thought about all the things that she hadn't seen or heard or done. I thought about the things that she had done without realizing that they were special. Now, I'm trying very hard not to put off, hold back or save anything that would add laughter and luster to our lives.

And every morning when I open my eyes I tell myself that this is a special occasion.

Every day is a special occasion. Each day is a gift! it is gift because you have one more day to share a laugh and your love with your family and friends; it is a gift because you have one more day to enjoy the beauty of nature; it is a gift because you have one more day to use the talents that God has bestowed in you; it is a gift because you have one more day to help someone in need. The list can go on and on.

I urge you to stop taking people and things for granted. Don’t put things off. If you need to tell somebody you love them, tell them! If you need to tell someone you are sorry, tell them. If you need to spend more time with your family, make more time! If you need to take a vacation, take it! If you need to pray more, pray more! I urge you whatever it is, get going, get busy and in the words of Nike, Inc., “Just Do it.”

***
It's your life: Live it, Love it & Celebrate it!
MJD

Getting Ahead: 212 Style

"It's never crowded along the extra mile."
~Wayne Dyer

***
A little extra effort goes a long way. If you want to attract success into your life, then you will have to give in order to get. The giving is in the form of extra effort. Remember, successful people are those who are working while everybody else is sleeping. Now, I don't mean that in literal sense. But, I do mean that successful people put forth the extra effort while others are not willing to do so.

You may have heard of the 212 philosophy. The 212 philosophy is based on the scientific principle of energy. Energy is the driving force of the universe. The 212 philosophy describes how a natural scientific law can be applied in our lives. The basis of the philosophy derives from the boiling point of water. At 211 degrees, water is just very hot water. But, by raising the temperature by just one degree, water boils and when water boils, steam is produced. When you produce steam, you have taken something that was very hot to something that has enough energy to power machines. Think of that, that one extra degree makes all the difference in the world. That one extra degree produces steam; steam that can power a locomotive.

The 212 philosophy reminds us that by consistently giving that little extra effort we can go from ordinary to extraordinary. The philosophy tell us that a little extra effort consistently applied can make all the difference in the world. There is no easy way, shortcut, or fast track to-the-top. It takes effort! And those that get to-the-top and stay at the top, are those that realize it was the extra effort that got them there, and it is the extra effort that will keep them there.

Think of the possibilities and opportunities that await you if you are willing to give a little bit more effort than you are giving now. If you are struggling with your current situation, if you are not where you want to be, don't look to blame others; blame yourself. Your results are in direct proportion to your effort. If you want to change your current situation, embrace the 212 philosophy.

Remember, the philosophy it is based on the natural laws of energy; laws which are fixed in nature and cannot be altered. I urge you to consistently give that little extra effort. Live the 212 philosophy. If you do, nature will see to it that you are rewarded exponentially.

***
It's your life: Live it, Love it & Celebrate it!
MJD

Grandmotherly Advice

"Life is what we make it, always has been, always will be."
-- Grandma Moses

***

Grandma Moses did not begin painting until late in her life. Having lived on a farm all of her life, she took up painting when the manual labor of the farm life became too difficult for her. She held her first exhibition was she was 78 years old. Her first paintings sold for $2 to $3. In 2006, Grandma Moses’ Sugaring Off portrait sold for $1.2 million. Grandma Moses died at the age of 101 in 1961

Grandma Moses is right; "Life is what we make of it." It does not matter if you are young or old, for age can only be defined by a number; whereas, life is defined solely by what you put into it. Take heed of the example set by Grandma Moses: it is never too late to fulfill your potential. Remember the potential is there, it always has been, it is just up to you to grasp it!

Happy Birthday! Anna Mary Robertson (Grandma Moses)
7 September 1860 - 13 December 1961

***
It's Your Life: Live it, Love it, Celebrate it!
MJD

The Champion Within

“In the dust of defeat as well as in the laurels of victory there is a glory to be found if one has done his best.” —Eric Liddell

Lidell is paraphrasing the old adage, “It doesn’t matter if you win or lose its how you play the game.” Simply put, it all comes down to effort. If you have given your best, what more can one ask of you? Sure defeat hurts. However, when you know you have given your best, the pain of defeat seems to begin to fade quickly. Conversely, knowing that you did not give your best only fosters the pain of regret. And, the pain of regret can endure a lifetime. You’ll always wonder what might have happened if you would have given your best effort.”

I frequently talk to my children about being a champion. I want them to develop the attitude of a champion. I encourage them to strive to be a champion every day and in everything they do. When I speak of becoming a champion, I’m not talking about being the best at everything they do; I’m talking about giving their best in everything they do. Striving to be the best at everything you do is unrealistic. Why? We have no control or choice over the God given talents and abilities that were instilled in us; that was God’s choice. We will surely run into all kinds of people who will have more talent and abilities than us in a given area. What is not unrealistic is striving to give your best in everything you do.

One definition of a champion is “a person who has the attributes of a winner.” Besides talent, I know of no other attribute that defines a winner better than a willingness to give their best. James Allen once said, "In all human affairs. There are efforts and there are results, and the strength of the effort is in the measure of the result." James Allen is referring to the Law of Reaping and sowing; you get what you deserve. When you give your best effort, you may not be declared the best, but you can certainly say you gave your best. When you accept a challenge and give your best, there are no losers, only winners, and that makes you a champion.

I ask you: Are you giving your best at what you do, or are you just going through the motions?

Remember, when you give your best, you become a champion; a champion to the most important person in the world, and that person is you!

***
It's Your Life: Live it, Love it & Celebrate
MJD

The Power of Kindness

"Too often we underestimate the power of a touch, a smile, a kind word, a listening ear, an honest compliment, or the smallest act of caring, all of which have the potential to turn a life around."

-- Leo F. Buscaglia

***

What act of kindness will you engage in today? Will it be a healing touch, a friendly smile, an uplifting kind word, a non judgmental listening ear, a reassuring compliment or some other act of caring. Kindness always creates a win-win situation. Being kind always has the potential to turn two lives; yours and the recipient of your kindness.

Today, engage in some random act of kindness. I guarantee you'll instantly feel better that you did!

***
It's Your Life: Live it, Love it, Celebrate it!
MJD

Oh! The Simple Things

"Life is really simple, but we insist on making it complicated."
-- Confucius

***

Oh, the simple things in life! Why is it that we have a tendency to make things so much more complicated than need be? We make things more complicated when we are no longer true to ourselves. Things become complicated when we try to keep up with the Jones’, or when we live according to someone else’s standards/definitions. Life becomes complicated when make decisions that are inconsistent with our very being. Shakespeare said it best, "to thine self be true."

Recently, I had what I thought was difficult decision to make. The more I thought about it, the more complicated the decision making process became. I wrestled with the decision for quite some time. Just when I thought I was at a mental/emotional impasse, behold! I had an epiphany. I wrote down my top five values in order of importance. Right there, right then, the right decision was starring me in the face.

When everything was said and done, I made the right decision; right because I was being true to thine self. The decision was consistent with what was most important to me. When you make decisions and live your life according to your values, life becomes simple. It becomes simple because the Jones’ no longer have influence in your life. They have moved and taken up residency somewhere else. Life becomes simple when you don’t allow someone else, the media, or mainstream society to tell you how to act or who to be. Being true to what is really important in your life is liberating; being liberated, life becomes simple.

I find it interesting that life’s most important things can actually be life’s simple things. If you want out of the confusion, chaos and complexity of everyday life, simplicity is right around the corner. It is simple – be true to thine own self and simplicity will follow.

It's Your Life: Live it, Love it, Celebrate it!
MJD

Can Money Buy You Happiness?

No man can become rich without himself enriching others."
-- Andrew Carnegie

***

Money gets a bad rap. You have heard it said before, “Money is the root of all evil.” Money is not the root of evil things. It is the love of and obsession of money that can bring forth and perpetuate evil thoughts and actions. So there you have it; money, in of, and by itself is neither good, nor evil. Money is just an entity that stores value. It is the value that we place on money that is the determining factor. It is true that the obsession of money and acquiring wealth has ruined lives, families, businesses and organizations. It is also true that the giving of money to those in need has saved lives, families, businesses and organizations.

The world is full of well-known philanthropists who amassed fortunes only to give it away for the betterment of mankind. The names of Rockefeller, Buffet, Ford and Carnegie come to mind. It was Andrew Carnegie who stated, “The rich have a moral obligation to be benevolent.” Carnegie’s story is a “rags to riches” tale. Carnegie was born 1835 in Scotland, and grew up in poverty. Carnegie once wrote, “ I began to learn what poverty meant. It was burnt into my heart then that my father had to beg for work. And then and there came the resolve that I would cure that when I got to be a man." At the age of 12, the Carnegie family moved to the United States. Carnegie vowed that if he ever became rich, he would give his fortune away. Andrew Carnegie did become wealthy. In fact, he become one the richest entrepreneurs of his age. Carnegie amassed a fortune as a pioneer in the American steel industry. By 1911, Carnegie had formed numerous foundations, resulting in the giving away of 90 percent of his fortune.

Everyday, not so well known people give to those in needs; it could be some spare change to a homeless person, a gift of money to a support a family who lost their home to a fire, purchasing a benefit dinner ticket for a person with a serious illness, or making a donation to a worthwhile charity or foundation.

So now, I pose the question: Can money buy happiness? I say, yes! Money can make you happy; not by acquiring wealth, power, and material possessions, but by the giving of money to others. In order to experience happiness, the giving must be without the expectation of something in return. Have you ever noticed how you experience a sense of fulfillment and satisfaction when you give money or one of your possessions to someone truly in need?

In a recent experiment, researchers from the University of British Columbia and Harvard Business School demonstrated a correlation between happiness and giving. Participants were given a $10 bill and were asked how much they would share with someone else. Those that gave away the most money reported higher levels of happiness.

There you have it; money can buy happiness. Money can bring happiness if it is given for the benefit of another. If you don’t believe me, take it from leading authority on giving: Jesus Christ. The Good Lord said, 'It is more blessed to give than to receive.” Acts 20:35.

***
It's your life: Live it, Love it & Celebrate it!
MJD

Stand By Me

"If the sky that we look upon Should tumble and fall
And the mountains should crumble to the sea
I won't cry, I won't cry, no I won't shed a tear
Just as long as you stand, stand by me."

-- Written by Ben E. King, Jerry Leiber, & Mike Stroller

***

The song Stand by Me was first performed by Ben E. King in 1961. Over the years it has been re-recorded by several artists and has become well known among both young and old. The song is a testament to the power of love. We will all experience adversity in our lives, but as long as you have someone standing by you, the power of love is sure to prevail. There are many people in our lives that need us to stand by them. Are you willing to be that person to stand by them? Or, have you become so preoccupied with your own life, that you don't have time or fail to recognize their need?

Ask yourself, who can I stand by today?

***
For the latest version of Stand By Me, visit www.playingforachange.org. The Playing For A Change organization is focused on promoting peace throughout the world through music. The video was made with various artists from all over the world.

***
It's Your Life: Live it, Love it, Celebrate it!
MJD

My Next One

“Good, better, best. Never let it rest. 'Til your good is better and your better is best.”
-- St. Jerome

***
Many have heard of the famous Frank Lloyd Wright. Frank Lloyd Wright was an American architect who lived from 1867 – 1959. In 1991 Wright was posthumously, recognized by the American Institute of Architects as "the greatest American architect of all time." Wright is credited with designing hundreds of magnificent structures. Frank Lloyd Wright was once asked, “Which one of your projects is your favorite?” To which Wright promptly responded, “My next one.”

How about you? Are you resting on your laurels? Are you settling for a life that is just okay? Are you living up to your potential? Those are questions we need to ask ourselves. The Good Lord has instilled in us more potential and ability than we’ll ever use. Scientists claim that a person of average intelligence uses only 10% of the brain’s capability. Just think, 90% of unused potential! What could you accomplish if you used just 5%, 10% or 25% more of your brain’s capability? The potential is there, just waiting to be tapped into. Our God is a God of abundance. When God told Adam and Eve to be fruitful and multiply, he was instructing them to go forth and produce abundantly. He was telling them that they have within them everything they need, and more, to live a life full of abundance. God’s discourse in the garden was not about limitations and restrictions. It was about potential! It was about understanding that this life is meant to be lived fully. It was about understanding that within each person there is the potential to live an abundant life; a life so full, that goodness naturally overflows unto others. It was about understanding that there are no limitations with God, and he will provide for you all that you need, if you are willing to do the work.

Now is the time to tap into all the potential that resides within you. Don’t let anyone rob you of your potential. More importantly, don’t rob yourself of your potential with self-defeating thoughts. The potential is there, ready to be unleashed. Once it is unleashed, you quickly realize that your best days are still ahead of you.

I have a quote that I use when playing golf that is similar to Frank Lloyd Wright’s quote, “My next one.” The quote reminds me to not dwell too long on either a good shot or a bad shot. It reminds me that what is in the past is but history and it’s the future that really counts. After I shot, good or bad, I say to myself, “You are only as good as your next one (shot).”

***
It's your life: Live it, Love it & Celebrate it!
MJD

The Gift of Encouragement

"My father gave me the greatest gift anyone could give another person, he believed in me."
-- Jim Valvano

***

Success is all about belief. It is about belief in yourself, along with the support of others believing in you too. How many times have hope and dreams been destroyed because of a lack of encouragement from others. When we believe we are capable of doing something or achieving something, sometimes all we need is a little encouragement from someone else. It is this encouragement or belief by others that validates our belief that we actually have what it takes to an achiever.

Today, make it a point to let someone know you believe in them. It is the gift of encouragement. It costs nothing and just a little bit can go along way!

***
It's Your Life: Live it, Love it, Celebrate it!
MJD

Standing on the Shoulder of Giants

“A mentor is someone who allows you to see the hope inside yourself.”-- Oprah Winfrey

***

Do you ever find that there are times when you don’t have the right answers? Are there times when you need help improving a technique or skill? Do you find yourself in situations where sometimes all you need is a little encouragement?

Throughout our lives, we will come in contact with people who will have a profound impact on us; some for the betterment, and unfortunately, some not so good. If we want to succeed, we need to be quick to identify, and sever any relationship with a person who is exerting a negative influence in our lives. What can be more challenging is identifying and developing a relationship with people who can help get us to the next level. These people are called mentors. A mentor is regarded as knowledgeable and possessing insight in a given area. The book of Proverbs (19:20) speaks to mentoring, it says, “listen to advice and accept instruction, and in the end you’ll be wise.”

Why don’t we seek out mentors? Is it because we might be embarrassed that we might not know something? Is it because we have too much pride? Is our ego getting in the way?

A mentor is any person who has your best interest at stake and is willing to teach you. . Believe it our not, most people are willing to share their wisdom and expertise with others. Their wisdom and expertise can be used to help you develop and monitor a game/life plan. Sir Issac Newton once said, “If I have seen further it is only by standing on the shoulder of giants. If you look at the history of all great men and women, you will find that someone, somewhere in time , took them under their wing.

Today, make it a point to find a mentor. If you have one, make sure you show your appreciation for the time and energy that they have spent on you. While you are at it, take a good look at your skills and expertise. Could you be a mentor to someone? All you need to do is show you care, be willing to listen, and share your experiences with your protégé. It is a win/win situation; you win, they win!

Remember, a good mentor can make the difference between becoming a champion or just a contender. Gotta go – searching for a giant or two!

***
It's your life: live it, love it & celebrate it!
MJD

A Postive Attitude

"I believe in taking a positive attitude toward the world. My hope still is to leave the world a little bit better than when I got here."
-- Jim Henson
1936-1990, Muppets Creator

***
Jim Henson left this world in 1990 at the age of 53.  Henson was known for his positive attitude, enthusiasm for life, and creative energy.  It was these qualities that gave life to such world known characters as Kermit the Frog, Miss Piggy, Big Bird, Bert and Ernie, and the like.  Jim Henson's Muppets have entertained children and adults alike.  His Muppets have brought laughter and smiles to the faces of millions worldwide.  And, when you can make someone laugh or smile, you make the world a better place.  Jim Henson made the world a better place one smile, one laugh at a time! 
You too can make the world a better place! So I ask you:  Who will you make smile (laugh), today?
***
It's Your Life: Live it, Love it, Celebrate it!
MJD

A Choice

"Happiness is an attitude. We either make ourselves miserable, or happy and strong. The amount of work is the same."
-- Francesca Reigler

***

What will you choose, happy and strong or miserable? The toll that misery takes on one's physical, emotional and social life can be devastating. Happy people, on the other hand, are generally healthier, emotionally stable, and report satisfaction with their social lives. It seems to me if the work is the same and the results are vastly different, the choice is clear!

Since your attitude is something that only you control, your are the one that will determine if you will be happy or miserable. The choice is yours! Choose happy!

***
It's Your Life: Live it, Love it, Celebrate it!
MJD

A Hero: John Wooden

"Talent is God given. Be humble. Fame is man-given. Be grateful. Conceit is self-given. Be careful."
-- John Wooden

***
The sports world lost an icon on Friday, June 4, 2010. John Wooden died at the age of 99. John Wooden has been called the "Greatest coach ever." Wooden was a proven winner; on the court and, more importantly, off the court. He won titles; but more importantly he won hearts. He was a master at teaching basketball, but more importantly, he was a master at teaching the lessons of life.

On February 10, 2010, I posted a blog, entitled "The Coach." The blog speaks to why John Wooden was so successful in basketball and, more importantly, in life.

John Wooden is known for his use of maxims. Recently, Wooden was asked, of all the maxims, which one do you like the most? He responded with, "Lord, make me beautiful inside."

Coach Wooden, you were definitely beautiful inside! Rest in Peace, My Hero!

***
It's Your Life: Live it, Love it, Celebrate it!
MJD

Guaranteed Return on Your Investment

"There is no exercise better for the heart than reaching down and lifting people up."
-- John Andrew

***

To invest means to devote or spend something for future benefit. We invest our money with the hope of a greater financial return. Students invest their time studying with the hope of getting good grades. Athletes invest in rigorous training/conditioning programs with the hope of becoming better in their chosen sport.

Basically, there are two types of investments: money and time. Financial investments vary from the conservative savings accounts to risky capital ventures. Conservative financial investments usually have a small predetermined return based upon a set percentage; whereas, risky investments can yield a significant monetary loss or gain.

Unlike financial investments that are limited to financial matters only, the investment of time is unrestricted. You can invest your time in anything you want to. The key is that your investment of time is productive; remember, "to devote for future benefit!"

Not being a financial advisor, I would never pretend to give you any advice on financial investments. However, I do offer some advice on how to invest your time. The advice is guaranteed to produce a significant return on your investment. My advice is to invest your time on others. Sounds simple, does it not! How can such simple advice about investing your time in others produce a significant return on your investment?

The Good Book tells us that it is in giving that you receive. The ancient writer tells us, “Give, and it will be given to you. Your gift will be returned to you.” In order for your gift to be returned to you, it cannot be given with the expectation of something in return. It does not work that way. Your gift of time must be unselfish and for the benefit of another.

Understand that most often, your gift of time will be returned to you; a return on your investment. It is called the law of reciprocity. Now, there may be days, months, and years that you have unselfishly invested your time for the betterment of another. And, it may appear that you have not received anything in return. Bear in mind that it is quite possible that your time and service to another may never be repaid during your lifetime. However, the law of reciprocity is still at work. It is at work on a much more significant level. The Good Lord sees your investment of time and love. Your gift of time on another person is pleasing to him and you will be repaid; just as the Good Book tells us. When you invest your time on others, God, in return, will invest his time in you; making your return on your investment eternal. And, there is no better return on your investment; I guarantee it!

***
It's your life: live it, love it & celebrate it!
MJD

Woulda. Coulda, Shoulda

"All The Woulda-Coulda-Shouldas
Layin' In The Sun,
Talkin' 'Bout The Things
They Woulda-Coulda-Shoulda Done...
But All Those Woulda-Coulda-Shouldas
All Ran Away And Hid
From One Little Did."

-- Shel Silverstein

***

When you say "would have,"" could have," or "should have," you are speaking the language of regret. Regret can be big or small, it can be short-lived or life-long, and it can have minimal effect or be totally devastating. Regret is about missed opportunities, it about the people you never met, the places you never went, and the things you never did. It is about failed dreams and dashed hopes. Simply put, you didn't take action when the opportunity presented itself.

When I go by a cemetery, I often think to myself how much unused potential has been buried in the ground. How many people could have been doctors, teachers, scientists, or how about the artists, musicians and ministers? How many people could have been so much more? What would they have become if they only took action. I wonder how much regret is buried in those graves?

Regret results from inaction. What is holding you back? Today is the day to take action. Start by embracing positive self-talk: "I will," "I can," and " I shall." Positive self-talk will result in taking some type of action. Action is the beginning of eliminating the woulda-coulda-shouldas in your life with and replacing them with the "one little did."

***
It's Your Life: Live it, Love it, Celebrate it!
MJD

Life is Like Riding a Bicycle

"Life is similar to riding a bicycle, you'll go nowhere unless you're willing to do the peddling."
-- Michael J. Dillon

***

POINT TO PONDER: It's your bicycle (life)! You're responsible for where your bicycle goes, nobody else. Your bicycle can take you anywhere you want to go. The two wheels on your bicycle know no restrictions. Where you take your bicycle, and how far you take it, will be dependent on how much you're willing to peddle. If you're not willing to peddle, your bicycle is going nowhere; no peddling means no movement.

Life is full of twist and turns, detours and obstructions, and mounds and hills. You can handle life's twists and turns if you stay focused, keep your eyes on the road, and keep peddling. Understand that life's detours and obstructions are meant to challenge you and help you grow. You can handle life's detours and obstructions if you're willing to accept change, learn new and different routes along the way, and keep peddling. You can make it up life's hills and over life's mounds, if you maintain faith, learn to practice self-discipline, and most importantly, keep peddling. Keep in mind, it's also important that you take time to relax and enjoy those moments when life allows you to stop peddling and coast for awhile; just don't coast too long, because in life in order to get somewhere you have to be willing to do the peddling!

Keep peddling and enjoy the ride!

It's your life: live it, love it, & celebrate it!
MJD

Tattle-Tale: A Lesson About Character

"People of character do the right thing, not because they think it will change the world, but because they refuse to be changed by the world."

-- Michael Josephson




Professional Golf Association (PGA) Rules call for a two-stroke penalty when a player moves any impediment with the start of the player’s backswing. On April 18, 2010, the penalty was imposed on Brian Davis at the Verizon Heritage Golf Classic played at the Harbour Town Golf Links in Hilton Head, South Carolina. The penalty was imposed on during a playoff round between Davis and eventual champion, Jim Furyk. The penalty cost Brian Davis the championship and over $400,000 in winnings.

The infraction was so slight that it was not witnessed by Furyk or PGA officials. However, Davis said he felt something on his takeaway swing. Davis immediately called for PGA officials and reported his own infraction. After reviewing the videotape several times in slow-motion, it was determined that Brian Davis did indeed strike a reed in his backswing. Jim Furyk was declared the winner.

It is refreshing to know that there are professional athletes that still play by the rules. In today’s society we’ve developed an attitude of "win at all costs." From youth sports to professional sports we have heard numerous stories where coaches and players have disregarded the rules for the sake of winning the game. In the business world, corruption is rampant. We are living in a “do whatever it takes” culture: lie, cheat, and/or steal in order to come out on top.

The story of Brian Davis’ honesty at Harbour Town overshadowed the win by Jim Furyk. The buzz wasn’t about Jim Furyk winning his 15th PGA Tour event. No, it was about a golfer telling the truth; a golfer whose self-reported violation cost him a chance at his first PGA Tour Victory. The story at Harbour Town was about a golfer who put honesty and integrity above money and winning.

We can all learn a lesson from Brian Davis. Davis’ display of true sportsmanship reflects what is really important in life; being a person of character. Character is doing the right thing at the right time even when nobody is paying attention. Our great President George Washington once said, “I hope I shall always possess firmness and virtue enough to maintain what I consider the most enviable of all titles, the character of an honest man." What Brian Davis lost of the course, he gained by strenghtening his character.

Remember if you use deceit to gain advantage, even if it is “just a little,” you may win in the short-term, but you’ll lose in the long run. You’ll lose, because even the littlest of deceit chips away at your character. It today’s culture it is easy to get caught up in the quest for winning. But remember, when the game of life is over, you’ll be judged not by the number of wins you’ve accumulated, but solely upon your character.

Brian Davis you’re my new hero!

***

It's your life: Live it, Love it & Celebrate it!
MJD

I Get To

"There is a huge price tag on grumbling for you and everyone around you.  The antidote is always gratitude." - Unknown

Grumble, grumble, grumble!  Why grumble?  Grumbling never solves problems, it only makes them worse. Grumbling is contagious!  Not only will it bring a grumbler down, it brings others down too.  Because the grumbler's sole focus is on the consequence(s) of a problem, the grumbler becomes blind to a resolution of the problem.  Grumbling is negative energy at work.  Negative energy will dictate a grumbler's thought process.  Hence, the grumbler continues to dwell on and complain about what is wrong.

Are you a grumbler?  Do you know someone who is a grumbler? In order to break the grumbling habit one needs to stop focusing on what is wrong in their life and focus on what is right.  I bet if you really thought about it, you'd find a lot more things right in your life than wrong.   So, I encourage you to stop focusing on what you don't have and appreciate what you do have.

The next time you're faced with situation in which you feel compelled to do something, don’t grumble and say, "I have to ..."  Instead, enthusiastically say," I get to …!"  When you say "I have to" it becomes an obligation.  When you say "I get to" it becomes a privilege.  There are many people who are significantly less fortunate than you.  People less fortunate than you would love to "get to do" what you feel you "have to do."  For instance, in today's economy, don't say, “I have to go to work,” Instead, say "I get to go to work."   Think of the number of people who are out of work right now.  I bet if they were offered a job they wouldn't see having a job as an obligation.  No, they would see it as a privilege!  They would "get to" go to work.   When you really think about why do we say, "I have to go to work?"

Make it a point to change everything in your life from "I have to" to "I get to".   Listen to the words you use.  If you hear yourself say, "I have to …,” change that to "I get to…" "I don't have to go to work; I get to go to work."  "I don't have to work-out; I get to work-out.  "I don't have to walk my dog; I get to walk my dog."   Not everybody is as fortunate to "get to" do what you get to do - always remember that!  When you take on a "get to" philosophy you'll experience the power of possessing an attitude of gratitude.  The positive energy of gratitude will change not only the way you look at a problem, but will change the way you see the world.  And, guess what, you’re the one in charge of the way you view the world.  “Have to” or “Get to” the choice is yours!

Gotta go now - gotta a few things "I get to" do before the day is done!

It’s your life: live it, love it and celebrate it!MJD

From Can't to Can

"The human spirit is indomitable"
-- Roger Bannister

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Today marks the anniversary of Roger Bannister being the first person to run a mile under four minutes.  At the time of the feat, running the mile under 4 minutes was believed to be humanly impossible.  Doctors and scientists believed that anyone who attempted such a feat would die trying.  On May 6, 1954 in Oxford, England, Roger Bannister ran the mile in a time of 3:59:4 seconds.  Due to Bannister's passion, belief, focus and work ethic, what once was thought to be impossible became a reality. 

Roger Bannister demonstrated to the world what the human spirit is capable of.  It only took 46 days for another runner, John Lundy, to break Bannister's world record time.  Since Bannister's eventful day in 1954, hundreds of other athletes have run a sub-four minute mile.  The current world record for the mile is 3:43.13

Bannister proved to the world, “The human spirit is indomitable.”  When cultivated appropriately, even scientific research can be proven wrong by a determined human spirit.  If the human spirit can prove scientific research invalid, just think what it can do to the cynics and naysayers in your life.  Christopher Reeves once said, "“For everyone who thought I couldn’t do it… for everyone who thought I shouldn’t do it… for everyone who said, ‘It’s impossible’… see you at the finish line!”

Life can be compared to a race.  It has a starting line and a finish line and time is a determining factor.  In a race we measure time by duration from start to finish.  A champion is declared solely by who had the fastest time.  The “Race of Life” is different.  Time is measured by the quality of time you spent from start to finish.  Your success will be determined solely by the manner in which you spent your time.  Don’t let others rob you of your destiny; believe and achieve!

As we continue in our “Race of Life,” we need to remember the story of Roger Bannister; the man who believed what couldn't be done could be done.  You can become a champion in the “Race of Life” by following the example of Roger Bannister: challenge yourself, invoke the human spirit, and believe that things can be done even when other say they can't.  And, if you need a little help, remember this powerful verse, “I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me – Philippians 4:13.

Runners to your mark, set, go!

It's Your Life: Live it, Love it & Celebrate it!

MJD

The Boomerang Theory

"Bless a thing and it will bless you. Curse it and it will curse you.
- Emmet Fox

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Fox's quote describes life's Boomerang Theory. The Boomerang Theory did not derive from scientific research or intense philosophical debate. It's not based upon a paradigm or scientific model. It doesn't take hundreds of pages to describe. No, the Boomerang Theory is very simplistic. It only consists of 10 words, but explains why we eventually get what we deserve in life.

The Boomerang Theory: Whatever you throw out into life, will return unto you!

When you toss a boomerang it always returns to its point of origin (you).   Hence, The Boomerang Theory of Life sets forth that  whatever comes from you, will return to you.

Therefore:

If love comes from you, love will return to you.
If hate comes from you, hate will return to you.

If kindness comes from you, kindness will return to you.
If rudeness comes from you, rudeness will return to you.

If tolerance comes from you, tolerance will return to you.
If prejudice comes from you, prejudice will return to you.

If humility comes from you, humility will return to you.
If arrogance comes from you, arrogance will return to you.

If respect comes from you, respect will return to you.
If contempt comes from you, contempt will return to you.

You get the picture!

So there you have it, the Boomerang Theory!

Make sure that whatever boomerang you toss out, you'll want to catch it when it returns!

***
It's your life: Live it, Love it & Celebrate it!
MJD

Paying the Price

"The dictionary is the only place where success comes before work. Hard work is the price we must pay for success. You can accomplish anything if you're willing to pay the price."
-- Vince Lombardi

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In these days of fast food, convenience stores, and super centers, our society has developed into a "Hurry up, I want it now" culture. Today, we want instant success. Like the dictionary, we want to put success before work. It doesn't work that way! We want the rewards, but are not willing to pay the price. When we look at others who are successful, we seem to focus on the fruits of their success, but pay little attention to the labor which bore the fruits. Rarely do we contemplate the hours of learning, training and hard work. We neglect to focus on the adversity, failures and disappointments one encountered. We see the benefits of success and say we want it. But, are we really willing to pay the price?

Unlike our "Hurry up, I want it now" culture, there is no fast lane to success. On the contrary, it's a slow lane. It's a slow lane that consists of bumps and turns. It's a lane that requires determination, focus and hard work. Success isn't measured by how far you make it to the top. Rather, it is measured by the road you've traveled in trying to make it to the top.
When it comes down to it, success can only be measured by the price you've paid.

***
It's Your Life: Live it, Love it, Celebrate it!
MJD

The Glass

"Stop asking if the glass is half full or half empty. Instead ask "What's in it? How did it get there? What can I do with it?"

-- David Kaufman

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If the glass is half empty, you're considered pessimistic. If the glass if half full, you're optimistic. Your attitude about life will determine how you see the contents of the glass. Kaufman's point is right on. When it comes down to it, it really doesn't matter how full or empty the glass is. What counts is an understanding of the present ("What's in it?"), the past ("How did it get there?"), and more importantly, the future ("What can I do with it?).

Your attitude will definitely effect the way you'll perceive something (half full or half empty). In the long run, it doesn't matter if your glass if half empty or half full, what does matter is doing to work to figure out how you'll fill your glass, so not only will you have enough, but it overflows so that another person's glass may be full!

May your glass be continually overflowing!

***
It's Your Life: Live it, Love it, Celebrate it!
MJD

The Power of Forgiveness

"Forgiveness does not change the past, but it does enlarge the future."

-- Paul Boese

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When you truly forgive someone it is a liberating experience. You release negative energy, in the forms anger, hostility and vengeance, that has taken hold of your heart and head. With a clear head and a clean heart, you can begin harnessing positive energy. Positive energy is the fuel which powers growth and development. With negative energy out and positive energy in, the future suddenly becomes bigger and brighter!

Make it a point today to truly forgive someone who may have wronged you. It really is the best thing you can do for yourself and someone else at the same time.

Talk about a win-win situation!

***
It's Your Life: Live it, Love it, Celebrate it!
MJD

I Don't Want to Grow Up!

"The secret of a genius is to carry the spirit of a child into old age."
- Aldous Huxley

***

Just the other day, my son officially made the leap from childhood into adolescence. March 22nd was his 13th birthday. On the night before his transformation from one stage of life to the next, as customary, I kissed him good night. I told him tomorrow was his big day. With a bit of trepidation, he responded, “Dad I don’t want to grow up.” Somewhat surprised, I asked, “Why don’t you want to grow up?” He looked me straight in the eyes and said, “I love being a kid and when you grow up you have so much responsibility.”

I acknowledged that he was correct and told him, “Yes, you do take on more responsibility. But, just as you take on more responsibility, you’ll find greater opportunities and more privileges.” I wasn’t convinced that he bought into my “opportunities and privileges” discourse. Rather, he wanted to be reassured that childhood doesn’t have to come to an end. I told him, “Cole, you don’t ever have to stop being a kid. You can always be a kid at heart.” I went on to inform him that there is a big problem with adults today, and that would be that most adults have forgot what it was like to be a kid.” I kissed him one last time, wished him happy birthday, and said, “I don’t care how old you get, never, and I mean never, stop being a kid at heart.”

”Never stop being a kid at heart,” I told him. Later that night, I thought to myself was I living my own advice, or was I too, like all the other adults who let both the magic and simplicity of childhood fade away as they got older.

How about you? Are you a kid at heart? Do you remember how you could create something out of nothing; like taking a take a trip without actually going anywhere; like having an imaginary friend appear out of nowhere; or like being a superstar of a game that was never really played? Our childhood creativity kept us occupied and allowed us to be satisfied. Our creativity fueled our dreams, and no dream seemed too big. As children we all had one thing in common; we were dreamers.

What happened to our dreams? Life happened to us, that’s what happened. Somewhere between childhood and becoming an adult our dreams began to fade away and slowly died. Life told us we needed to get busy and there is no room for dreamers. People told us we needed to be responsible. Besides, responsible people don’t dream their lives away. We were told that we needed to get serious, settle down and make something out of their lives. It was when we started listening to people who told us what we could do, or what we could not do, that our dreams became a thing of the past. Are you one of those adults who have stopped dreaming? .

And, what about childhood excitement? Do you remember sleepless night because of the excitement that tomorrow would bring; like Christmas presents, birthday parties, sleepovers, vacations and so many other things. Childhood excitement is magical and packed with loads of pure energy. Joseph Cornell said, “Look at everything as though you are seeing it for the first time, with eyes of a child, fresh with wonder.” Are you one of those adults who no longer gets excited about things? Do you believe that you are just too mature, or too old to get excited or express your excitement?

How about curiosity? Do you remember wanting to learn new things and searching for answers to your questions? Do you remember asking lots of questions over and over until you got it right? And, even when you thought you got it right, you asked more questions. Do you remember being so curious about something that you wouldn’t stop until you got the answers you were looking for? It’s a child’s curiosity that fuels their desire to learn and grow. There are so many things that children are curious about. Socrates once said, “ Wisdom begins in wonder.”; Do you still possess the curiosity of a child?. Do you continue to look for things until you find what our looking for?

What about faith? Faith develops out of trust. Children are trusting by nature. From birth, a child develops trust that others will take care of their needs. When learning to walk, a young child must trust that the outstretched arms will catch them if they fall. The child learning to ride a bike for the first time, trust that their parents will not let them fall. Children don’t need proof to believe in others or believe in things. Children live by faith; faith borne out of trust. And, because faith is borne out of trust, it always trumps fear. Children are generally happy because they have faith that things will work out. Do you possess the faith of child, or have you become cynical and a person of doubt?

And, then there is play! Do you still take time to play? When a child is at play, a child is at play. They invest their whole self into the activity. Even with their imaginations running wild, they never appear to get sidetracked. Their main purpose is to have fun. They could care less about what they look like or, what others say or think about them. Children can play by themselves or with others; it doesn’t matter to them. What does matters is that they have fun. Do you still take time to play? And, when you do play, do you play like a child or has your life become so hectic that there is no time for real play?

On Cole's birthday, as he unwrapping the gifts we gave him, I could not help but think of the gift he had given to me the night before. The gift he gave me did not come wrapped. It came from the heart of child. It didn’t come in a box. It came from childhood wisdom. Cole’s gift to me was a reminder; a reminder that I should never stop being a kid at heart. Thanks Cole! Thanks for reminding me to never stop dreaming, to never lose excitement for life; to look at things through the eyes of child, with curiosity; to have faith in people and things; and to take time to play like a child.

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Its your life: Live it, Love it & Celebrate it
MJD

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