A Confession!

Any man who can kiss a pretty girl and drive safely is simply not giving the kiss the attention it deserves.”

~ Albert Einstein

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I have a confession to make. I used to think I was really good at multi-tasking. In fact, I was proud to profess that I was pretty competent when it came to doing many things at once. Now, I’m here to say that I’m not very good at it at all. In fact, outside of chewing gum and walking at the same time, I realize that I shouldn’t be very good at doing more than one thing at a time. Instead, my focus should be on being good at the one thing I’m doing at the present time.

Because of our busy, hectic lifestyles, we tend to sacrifice quality for quantity. We tend to work harder, but not smarter. We believe that the more things we can “juggle” at one time, the better off we’ll be. Research has proven the opposite. People who multi-task while performing cognitive tasks experience a measurable drop in IQ (University of London). Medical research has demonstrated an increase in cortisol (the stress hormone) when people multi-task. Constantly switching from one activity to the next is downright stressful and exhausting. Glaring examples of the dangers of multi-tasking is texting/talking on the phone while driving.

Multi-tasking creates a lack of focus. It’s incredibly hard to focus when you have “a lot of balls in the air.” So today, I’m giving up multi-tasking for mindfulness. Mindfulness is deliberate awareness of the present moment. The first place I’m starting is with my “smart devices.” A smart device is the consummate multi-tasking lure. Don’t believe me - take a look at the number of “apps” you have on your phone and/or the number of apps that you have running at any one time. Text messages, e-mail messages, and voice messages instantly appear on-screen and distract you from the present moment. The enticement of Facebook notifications, Instagram photos, and tweets (Twitter) are social media thieves. They easily steal the present moment away from you.

Here’s a social experiment for you. The next time you go out to a restaurant, observe how many people have their smart devices out on the table. A number of them will be “ready, willing, and able” to be distracted from the present moment. In addition, watch how many people are looking at their devices when a conversation is going on at their table. It’s not uncommon to see no conversation going on at a table because the display (information/message/photo) on the smart device is more appealing than the people present.

I’m giving up multi-tasking and working towards mindfulness. Being mindful is living in the moment. It is a deliberate awareness of what is going on in the present. It is focusing on the people and the event taking place in the given moment. It is an understanding and appreciation that the particular moment is unique and it can never be created exactly the same.

So I ask you to join me in practicing mindfulness. Now, I’m not saying that there won’t be situations where you’ll have to run in different directions. That’s just a part of life. What I am saying is to maintain your focus on and enjoy the direction you happen to be running in. So I ask you, would you rather have a mind full (over-taxed) or be mindful?

I’m glad that I made this confession. It feels liberating! If I ever get asked, “Can you multi-task?” I’ll probably just say the only thing I think I can do is chew gum and walk at the same time!

Here’s to being mindful of mindfulness!

It's your life: live it, love it & celebrate it!

MJD

I Just Want to Say Thank You!

“That which does not kill us, makes us stronger”

- Friedrich Nietzsche

30-Second Timeout Talk:

I have been blessed to have had so many wonderful people teach me so many things about life; my parents, my siblings, relatives, friends, mates, acquaintances, and even strangers. Your guidance, counsel, impact, and influence on my life have been profound. To all of you, I say thank you! I’ve also been fortunate to have not very many, “not so wonderful people” teach me a thing or two about life. And, to you, I say thank you too!

You’re might be wondering why would you thank the “not so wonderful people?” The not so wonderful people are those people in your life who intend to create problems for you. Their motives are self-serving. These people delight by intending to destroy your reputation, your career and/or relationships. When you become the victim of the “not so wonderful people” of the world, the experience is emotionally distressing. Knowing that someone is trying to destroy your life can be “gut-wrenching.”

It’s “gut-wrenching until you figure out that the “not so wonderful people,” who are intending to tear you down are actually building you up. You see, the “not so wonderful people” are motivated by envy. You have or possess something they lack. In the process of attempting to tear you down (taking away what you have), they unknowingly teach you valuable lessons about yourself and about life! It’s when you embrace the learning opportunities that you begin the process of “building-up.” Talk about a plan backfiring – someone who wants to destroy you actually makes you a better, stronger person!

So yes, I say thank you! Thank you to everyone who has taught me about myself and about life. You all have had a great influence on my life. A special thank you to the few “not so wonderful,” you unknowingly, have perhaps, taught me some of the greatest lessons I have ever learned!

Here’s to better and stronger!

It's your life: live it, love it, & celebrate it!

MJD

The Exam

“Life is the most difficult exam. Some people fail because they try to copy others, not realizing everyone has different questions.  ” –Author Unknown

30-Second Timeout Talk:

                       

Life is one great big exam.  Every day we must answer questions.  Some questions don’t require much thought and we can answer them almost instinctively; while other questions can be very complex and require a great deal of careful consideration.  Just like any other test our answers (words & actions) will determine our results. 

Charles Caleb Colton is credited with saying, “Imitation is the highest form of flattery.”  It’s perfectly alright to espouse the redeeming qualities of people we admire.  Who would not want to espouse the way Mother Teresa’s demonstrated love and compassion? How about the leadership qualities and visioning of Dr. Martin Luther King?  What about the qualities of your favorite teacher, favorite coach or favorite boss.  We all need role models and people we admire.  The examples they have set forth should help us in our journey of becoming the person we were designed to be.  There is and will only be one Mother Teresa, one Dr. Martin Luther King, and one you.  So be you! 

Life is a big exam and the questions on the exam are different for each and every one of us.  The Good Lord created your exam specifically for you.  Moreover, he’s created you with a unique set of DNA.  DNA designed to equip you with getting high marks on your exam.  So it does you no good to try and copy (be just like someone else) others.  Their exam is different – with a different set of questions and designed specifically for them.  Always remember, you are unique; unique purposely!  Mike Robbins says it best, "Be yourself, everyone else is already taken

Here are my tests taking tips:

1. Be self-aware.  Know who you are and determine the person that you want to become.
2. Understand what is important to you and why it is important.
3. Don’t be in hurry – you have the rest of your life to complete your exam. 
4. Be willing to change.  You can always change your answers.  Progress comes from change.
5. Live in the moment.  Appreciate the people and the experiences that that are occurring in the present moment. 
6. Love don’t judge.  Since everyone has a different exam and you don’t know their questions, don’t judge them.  Instead, love them!  When you love others, you’ll easily find all the right answers to the questions your exam.  Love always prevails!  Remember, “Above all, love each other deeply, because love covers over a multitude of sins (wrong answers).” 1 Peter 4:8 (NIV). 

Here’s to achieving 100% on your exam!  

It's your life: live it, love it, & celebrate it!

MJD

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