Tuesday, January 26, 2016

Be Good To Yourself

“You're walkin' a high wire,
Caught in a crossfire,
Oh be good to yourself”

- Journey (
Be Good to Yourself – 1986)
***
Be good to yourself!  Being good to yourself is not selfish; it’s not about self-pity; and, it surely isn’t about being self-obsessed.  It’s about being kind to you.  It means acknowledging and accepting our imperfect human conditions: physical, mental and emotional.   It means that as humans we are not always going to get it right so it is imperative that we forgive ourselves.  Being good to yourself is about practicing compassion; self-compassion!

Compassion thwarts the throes of judgment and evaluation and embodies the characteristics of kindness and acceptance.  If we can treat our mistakes, misgivings and miscalculations with kindness, we put ourselves in a better position to learn from the errors of the past, which fosters growth.   Being overly self-critical on the other hand inhibits learning and growth.  It fosters judgment and evaluation of the person as a whole and not the specific action or inaction of the person.  A harshly, self-critical person begins to think they are “not capable” and/or they are “not worthy.”   Bear in mind that thoughts produce feelings, and feelings produce beliefs.  When someone believes that they are “not capable” and/or are “not worthy,” hope begins to wane.   And, without hope, people become indifferent and settle for as is.

So, it is imperative that you stop the self-judgment, self-evaluation, and self-beating and be good to yourself!  Disappointment, adversity, and hardship are akin to the human condition.  Not one of us is immune to it.  Being good yourself is a mental and emotional state that you have control over.   You have heard it said before, “It’s not what happens to you, but how your respond to what happens to you that counts.”   When you’re good to yourself you’re promoting mental and emotional health.  So, make it a habit.  It’s something that can be learned, practiced and developed.   So in the words of the band Journey, “Be good to yourself!”

-MJD

It’s your life; live it, love it & celebrate it!

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