What's the Score

"Man is fond of counting his troubles, but he does not count his joys. If he counted them up as he ought to, he would see that every lot has enough happiness provided for it."
~Fyodor Dostoevsky

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A score is kept in athletic contests, recreational games and even most board games. Keeping score is nothing more than counting. The reason we keep score is to determine who wins. Dostoevsky is right on point! In the game of life, most people have a tendency to count and focus on losses (troubles) more so than wins (joys).

Counting troubles is negative thinking. Negative thinking produces negative results, which leads to more counting, more negative thinking, and more negative results. The cycle perpetuates itself. Understand, If you choose to count an event as troublesome, you are inviting more trouble into your life. Why? – Because negative thinking produces a negative expectation. We as humans do not like to be wrong, so we look to validate what we perceive (expect) to be true. If one begins with a negative expectation, one will immediately start looking for something negative in an event. It does not matter what happened or what did not happen, a negative person, not wanting to be wrong, will find the event as negative.

Keep in mind though, that an event is neither negative or positive. It is simply an event. An event is an objective occurrence. The value (positive or negative) we place on a event is subjective and is influenced by our expectation of the event (before) and the meaning we ascribe to the event (after). Negative people have a negative expectation, look for the negative, and will ascribe a negative meaning to the event. On the other hand, positive people expect positive, look for the positive, and will see the event as positive. How is it that two people can experience the exact same event and view it completely differently; one as positive and the other as negative? It is all a matter of choice!

Positive people face adversity too. Unlike the negative person, they choose to look for something good out of the adversity. Positive people live by three important principles when it comes to adversity: first, in every adversity there is something good; second, it is through adversity that growth and development takes place; and third, the good may not be evident for some time, nonetheless it is still there. So when adversity befalls a positive person, they choose to count the event as something good instead of something troubling.

If you need a little more convincing that the way you think influences your results, I urge you to contemplate the wisdom of King Solomon, “for as one thinks in his heart, so is he.” Think positive, be positive; think happy, be happy.

As life goes on, we will undoubtedly continue to keep score of our troubles and our joys. You will always win when you choose to focus on and count the joys. Remember, you are the scorekeeper in the game of life and you get to decide the outcome!

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It's your life: Live it, Love it & Celebrate it!
MJD