Make That Change!

“Everyone thinks of changing the world, but no one thinks of changing himself.”
~Leo Tolstoy

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There is a story of young man whose imagination had no limits. He dreamed of changing the world. As he grew older and wiser, he discovered the world would not change. Still ambitious, he set his sights on changing his country. Over the years, he learned that like the world, his country would not change either. During his twilight years, he was certain that he could change those closest to him. Hence, he made a desperate attempt to change his family. Like the world and his country, his family would not change.

On his deathbed, he parted wisdom to his son. He said, “Son, don’t try to change the world, change yourself. I have come to realize that if I had only changed myself first, then by example I would have changed my family. From their inspiration and encouragement, I would then have been able to better my country and, who knows, I may have even changed the world.”

Do you know anyone like the man in the story? Are you someone who looks to change others, but fails to realize that it is you that must change? It is always another person's problem, mistake, or inadequacy. One of the biggest mistakes a person can make is to try and change somebody. It is a mistake because a person will not change unless the motivation to change exists. Just because you are motivated to change someone else, does not mean the person you wish to change shares the same motivation or has any motivation for that matter. Change has to come from within. Most often your attempt to change someone is met by them with resistance, hostility, or withdrawal. And, you are left to feel resentful, bitter, or frustrated. Instead of fighting a losing battle of trying to change someone else who does not want to change, look first to change yourself.

How do you change yourself? It starts with attitude. Because you control your attitude, you can change your attitude. Because you can change your attitude, you can change your behavior. Because you can change your behavior, you can change! Dr. Wayne Dyer says, “If you change the way you look at things, the things you look at change.” If you are unhappy and trying to change everybody and everything, stop right now. If you want things in your life to change, you must change. The Good Book tells us, “Don’t copy the behavior and customs of this world, but let God transform you into a new person by changing the way you think. Then you will learn to know God’s will for you, which is good and pleasing and perfect.” (Romans 12:2)

Remember, you did not get where you are at overnight. Change takes time. Understanding the need and the willingness to change is half the battle. The song, Man in the Mirror (1988), performed by the late King of Pop, Michael Jackson, and written and composed by Siedah Garrett and Glen Ballard tells us that in order to change things we have to start with ourselves:

I’m starting with the man in the mirror,
I’m asking him to change his ways,
And, no message could have been any clearer,
If you want to make the world a better place,
Take a look at yourself and then make a change.

Make that change!

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It is your life: live it, love it & celebrate it!
MJD