Sticks & Stones

“A blow with a word strikes deeper than a blow with a sword.”

--Robert Burton

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It is likely that children at one time or another, have professed, "Sticks and stones may break my bones, but words will never hurt me."  When said, a child is admitting to his/her aggressor that they recognize that physical injury may be eminent, but emotionally they’re as solid as a rock.  They profess that the mean and nasty things being said about them doesn’t affect them.  Unfortunately, the idiom is just that, an idiom.  Words do hurt! 

Indeed, being struck by a stick or stone may cause physical injury.  The injury will likely heal in a short period of time.  However it’s words, not the sticks and stones that have the potential to create the most devastating type of injury.  Mean-spirited words are intended to cause harm and are damaging to the spirit.  Even unkind words said in jest can damage another’s spirit. 

The human body is a remarkable organism.  It is capable of performing a multitude of complex functions without any conscious intervention on our part.  One of these functions is the body's ability to heal itself.  After a physical injury and in due time, the body will attempt to recover to its pre-injury state.  A physical injury may leave a scar, but the scar does not inhibit the body's ability to function.  Over time, even a scar begins to fade. 
 

In all likelihood, one would recover from an assault caused by the hurling of a sticks and stones;   not so with an assault caused by insults, criticism, and rejection.   Mean-spirited words damage the spirit.  The spirit, unlike the body, does not have the capability to heal itself without intervention.   The spirit requires active intervention on our part.  Unlike the body, scars to the spirit often do not fade with time.  If the damage from a verbal assault goes unchecked, lifelong emotional scars may develop.  It is these scars that often lead to a self-fulfilling prophesy of inadequacy, resulting in a lifetime of discontentment and unhappiness.

Remember that mean-spirited words come from mean-spirited people. Mean-spirited people say mean-spirited things because they are discontented and unhappy.  Think about it – do happy people say mean things?  Generally mean-spirited people are insecure and have a low self-esteem.   They call you names, insult you, and ridicule you in an attempt to feel more adequate.  Instead of addressing their "issues," they displace their negative thoughts and feeling about themselves onto you through hurtful words.  Remember, it is the name caller that has the problem, not you!   Why take on their life of discontentment and unhappiness.  So forget about what Uncle Bob said to you years ago or the names the neighbor kid use to call you.  Chances are they’re still unhappy and saying mean things to others.  Food for thought: if you don’t respect someone, why worry about what they have to say about you or anyone else for that matter.   And, if they are a mean-spirited person, they’re not worthy of your respect. 

If you're one of those people who are injuring others with hurtful words, remember the words you choose to utter perpetuates your dislike of yourself, which is perpetuating your discontentment and unhappiness.  Matthew 15:18 tells us, “But what comes out of the mouth proceeds from the heart, and this defiles a person.”  So, instead of making comments to others about what don't like about them or their inadequacies try holding your tongue.  Do yourself a favor and address what you don't like about yourself.  For when you do, you’ll find you have less and less to say about others.   

Life is about choice - choose your words wisely!

It’s your life: live it, love it & celebrate it!