Frustration isn't a "Bad Word"

“You’re frustrated because you keep waiting for the blooming of flowers of which you have yet to sow the seeds.”

- Dr. Steve Marabli

Frustration isn’t a “bad word!” Frustration’s purpose is to promote. Those who have experienced success, first experienced frustration! Frustration, as painful as it can be at times, is a necessary building block to success.  Successful people are not immune from feeling frustrated; they’re just adept at managing it.  The road to success will always be paved with frustration. Hence, I offer you 10 ways to effectively manage frustration.
 

Have Realistic Expectations:  Most times, frustration comes from the fact that the results we are getting do not meet our expectations.  The greater the expectation the more likely we will experience frustration.  You become the very source of your frustration when you have unrealistic expectations. It’s great to have high expectations, but expectations have to be realistic. 

Celebrate the Small Successes.  All too often when we focus too much on the end result and not on the process we experience frustration.  It is during the process that we can experience the small wins.   We need to look for and celebrate those times.  It’s by focusing on the small wins that we stay energized and keep our sights set on bigger and better things to come.

Search for the Good in All Things:  This is all about attitude – and you and you alone control your attitude.   Often times when we get frustrated, it’s because of our attitude; it’s easy to take on a negative or pessimistic attitude.  If we focus on the negative, we’ll get negative results; negative results, which perpetuate and exacerbate our frustration. Remember, you become what you think about. Think positive – be positive!
 

Laugh often:  Laughter is good for the soul.  It’s a miracle drug that reduces stress, feels invigorating, and gives you a sense of rejuvenation. The best thing about laughter is it is totally free and has no side effects, except maybe sore stomach muscles from laughing to hard.  Laugh often and take time to laugh at yourself! 
 

Be a Good Observer:  During times of frustration look to others whom you admire/respect and observe how they handle themselves during stressful situations.

Read, Read, Read: Stay inspired and keep frustration at bay by reading motivational and inspiration writings.  From lesson 4:  You become what you think – read positive, think positive, and be positive! 

Believe in yourself.  During times of frustration, it is easy to start doubting yourself:  “Do I have what it takes?” and “Am I right for this?” are just a few of the doubtful questions we ask ourselves.  Doubt is a cousin of fear.  Like fear, doubt can paralyze us
and leave us with little chance to grow.  Always believe in yourself.  Believing in yourself quells doubt and allows you to step outside your comfort zone; for it is outside the comfort zone that real growth occurs.
  

Allow Mistakes and Failures to Serve You.   It is easy to get frustrated when you believe you made a mistake or may have failed at something.   Errors in judgment are not intended to punish us they are intended to serve us.  Look for the lesson in the mistake, learn from the lesson and be determined to live the lesson you were taught.
 

Take Care of Yourself.  In times of frustration we tend to get so caught up in our frustration that we neglect to take care ourselves.  It’s when we are frustrated that we need to pay the most attention to ourselves: we need to eat right, get plenty of sleep, and exercise often. Diet, exercise, and sleep are critical components of a healthy lifestyle and their benefits have been scientifically proven, over and over! 

Pray:  Never underestimate the power of prayer – enough said! 

Frustration is not a “bad word!”  Always remember that today’s frustration is helping to develop you for tomorrow’s fight.

It’s your life: live it, love it, and celebrate it! 
MJD 

The Masquerade

“And, after all, what is a lie? 'Tis but the truth in a masquerade”
- Alexander Pope

***

Children are the great pretenders!  They can have a pretend friend.  They can pretend to visit far-off places.  They can pretend to be a superstar or a superhero.  In fact, they can pretend just about anything.  Most people think that as children age they stop pretending; nothing could be further from the truth.  In fact, as we age, some people get better at pretending.  It’s during adolescence years that some people will embark on what can be a lifelong masquerade.

 

A masquerader chooses to hide behind the cover of a convenient, well-crafted mask.  The mask serves to conceal one’s real self while providing others with a false impression of something they are not.   Attempting to impress someone or be accepted by them, the masquerader will strategically put on and take off their mask. 

      

Some people get so good at wearing masks; they forget who they are and deny their true existence.  Unfortunately, wearing a mask inhibits the development and maintenance of worthwhile, significant interpersonal relationships.  Developing and maintaining deep and meaningful relationships requires that both parties reveal their true selves.

Pretending in childhood is a good thing.  It promotes cognitive development and learning.   Pretending allows for self-expression, critical thinking and the use of the imagination/creativity.  It also fosters the development of social and emotional skills and contributes to enhanced language skills.   Pretending (masking) in adulthood is not such a good thing.  Adult pretending can lead to a conflicted and complicated life, a life marked by a pervasive sense of being unfulfilled.  How can one ever feel fulfilled when hiding behind a mask? 

  

God made each one of us unique.  I’m pretty sure he did that for a reason!  We look differently.  We have different talents, different skills and abilities, and different thoughts and feelings.  We honor God when we acknowledge, appreciate, and live as our true selves.  So, if you happen to wear a mask, do yourself a big favor and throw away your mask.  It’s time that you begin living the life that YOU were uniquely created and designed to live.  Stop living your life to impress someone or be accepted by them.  If they don’t like the real you, they don’t deserve the real you. 

When it comes right down to it, it is about living authentically.  Living an authentic life allows you to maximize your full potential and experience true happiness – happiness on your terms.  So be you!   In the words of Mike Robbins, “You might as well be yourself, everyone else is already taken.”

Remember, GOD loves YOU and YOU should too!
(and so do I!)

It’s your life: live it, love it & celebrate it!
MJD